HI Laurams,
I am glad that you are having someone out to help your. If the dog is not neutered I would strongly suggest this. The dog listens to your boyfriend more than you because your dog sees your boyfriend differently then he sees you. He sees your boyfriend as one who is more of a leader and it may be because he is more consistant with the dog when he is with him.
Also when you tell a dog no you should give something to replace it or you should immediately reward the dog once it stops the behavior, if only for a brief minute. Then build on that brief moment and make it longer and longer.
You need help with obedience training as your are going about it the wrong way. Also a dog should never be put in his crate for punishment.
Playful biting should never be tolerated or it can lead to just what it did tonight when you pulled him away from the window. Tug of war games should never be permitted either.
I am going to direct you to a site for clicker training which is based on reward for what you are asking the dog to do.The reward is immediate so the dog associates the act with the reward.
I would suggest you still get the dog into a training class so he can learn how to properly socialize with other dogs. Socialization is very important for a dog or he will be aggressive toward other dogs for the rest of his life, and as he grows it will be much harder to work and retrain.
` Clicker training
http://www.clickerlessons.com/
video, shows how clicker training is done http://www.clickertrainusa.com/clicker-training-videos.htm
dog training consultant
24 years training & behavior,pet first aide, Therapy dog eval., PA Animal Response Team