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I seem to mess everything up with one person repeatedly I don't understand why I do it everything seems to be going perfect and then I go do something hurtful towards them. Its also the same person I end up hurting

Submitted: 221 days and 8 hours ago.

Category: Mental Health

Value: $9

Status: AWAITING EXPERT REPLY

Age: 20; Male, United Kingdom

Already Tried:
I haven't tried anything so far. i have been tempted to go to a councilor and things because i always seem to dig myself into the same hole that i get out of. Like i always seem to need to be in a relationship and if im not i always get really lonely and depressed. Although this is a different problem could be a part of why I do such things.

Posted by Dr.Keane 221 days and 8 hours ago.

Answer

Hi and welcome....

Who is the one person you do this to? relationships? family? There are many reasons why this can happen. Who specifically who you do this to? I can help you with this after I have this information.

221 days and 8 hours ago.

Reply

my best friend who is also an ex 4 years but weve seen each other through hell

Posted by Dr.Keane 221 days and 8 hours ago.

Answer

Hi

So this is your best friend? an ex, and you've been through hell together. It sounds as though you may be projecting some of your own anger towards this person instead of directing toward it's source. You may benefit greatly from counseling. Pushing people away is one way you won't get hurt in a relationship. If this person has been the target of your hurt could it be that the relationship really didn't end as "best friend" and you are both dependent on each other for another reason that neither of you either recognize or acknowledge? Those we are close to in life are usually the ones who bear the brunt of our frustrations and anger, and that works both ways.
You sound like a nice guy and the good news is you recognize that something is wrong and seem willing to go get the help you deserve. I hope this has been helpful. I am here if you need follow-up.
Dr. Keane

221 days and 8 hours ago.

Reply

sounds about right to me really to be honest I have been trying to change things in my head but only works for like a week then i go back to my previous state. Like shes going through a rough time at the minute with realtionship troubles among other things and for some reaosn i just exploded over nothing and to be honest I tend to forget why I do them so I really should take up counciling then?

Accepted Answer

Hi, absolutely, it may well be that your feeling for her are deeper than you thought, and if they are not, both of you need to move forward and forge other relationships. You will benefit greatly from counseling. So there is a reason you explode, you'll discover what they are in therapy. Good luck, I hope this is helpful.
Dr. Keane
I am available for followup if needed and please click accept and leave feedback . Thank you.

Accepts:
Expert:	Dr.Keane
Pos. Feedback:	100.0 %
Answered:	4/15/2009

Psychologist

Clinical Psychology PHD, Licensed Professional Counselor, Marriage/Family, Teens, Child Psychology,

221 days and 7 hours ago.

Reply

Thanks for your help. I kinda thought I would need counciling because always thought there were more to my character flaws than it seemd :D thanks

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I seem to mess everything up with one person repeatedly I don't understand why I do it everything seems to be going perfect and then I go do something hurtful towards them. Its also the same person I end up hurting

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Answer

Hi and welcome.... Who is the one person you do this to? relationships? family? There are many reasons why this can happen. Who specifically who you do this to? I can help you with this after I have this information.

Reply

my best friend who is also an ex 4 years but weve seen each other through hell

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Accepted Answer

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Thanks for your help. I kinda thought I would need counciling because always thought there were more to my character flaws than it seemd :D thanks

Related Mental Health Questions

Hi and welcome....

Who is the one person you do this to? relationships? family? There are many reasons why this can happen. Who specifically who you do this to? I can help you with this after I have this information.