Hello Linda. I am so sorry for your loss. Having a Grey of my own about the same age, I can't imagine the devastation of losing him. I'm sure you realize there will be no way for me to give you an exact cause of death. That could only be done by having had a necropsy done by a very qualified avian vet. I can say that it does not sound like you were working with a vet who was highly skilled with birds. I feel fairly safe in saying it should not have gotten this far. Parrots are not supposed to have dairy products, that's true. However, that advice is always based on a norm, rather than a definite. Most parrots are lactose intolerant and dairy products can cause intestinal upset, to different degrees, in different birds. There do not seem to be any absolutes in this, so far. I know some parrots who are ill if they only have a taste. I know some others who seem able to tolerate it, in very limited amounts, and do okay. I always advocate not allowing it at all due to the uncertainty of their reaction. I just don't think they need it enough to be worth the risk. So, maybe the milk was somewhat at fault. As for the honey, I've never heard of it being "prescribed" for anything. That doesn't mean there may not be a valid reason for it that I'm not aware of. I would, however, really quiz any vet who suggested it as to the reasons and what benefit they think it would be to my bird. What really jumps out at me is your reference to it seeming as if "her insides were pushing out". If you are positive your bird was female, she could have been egg bound. She would not have needed a male bird present to decide to lay eggs. He is only needed for fertile eggs. Not enough calcium stores in the body are the main cause of a bird becoming egg bound and keeping them supplied with, and absorbing, an adequate amount of calcium can be tricker with Greys than almost any other type of parrot. Even if they have plenty in their diet, if they do not also have a full spectrum light providing what they need, their bodies are unable to properly absorb and metabolize the calcium. What happens is, she decides, by natures schedule, to lay but she does not have enough calcium to form firm shells for her eggs. When eggs are too soft, they are not able to pass them, then they are egg bound. That is only the first step in what is often a life threatening emergency. The first thing that happens is they do appear to be very ill, behaviors and vocalizations change, droppings usually change in appearance and amount, the bird becomes more lethargic. The next step is the egg may start pressing on the blood supply and nerves to the legs and feet. Some will lose the use of one or both legs, they will seem disoriented as they can't maintain balance. The final two things that can happen are that the egg will rupture inside the bird and/or she will have a prolapse of her uterus because she has strained so hard trying to pass the egg, she literally turns herself inside out. In this situation, and if either of those last two happen, we literally have minutes to get them into the care of a very competent vet. It's not my place to question your vet but if this had been my bird, with these symptoms, I would have expected far more, and better attention to the problem beyond take her home and feed her honey. It's just my opinion that was very irresponsible. Could your bird have been saved by a true avian vet? Of course we can't say and will never know but I feel there was more that could have and should have, been done. What I do know for sure is, there are still too many dog/cat vets out there who are great at what they do. But they do not have the extensive extra training and experience to deal with birds, especially not serious life threatening situations like this one obviously was. Many of them are reputable and conscientious enough to fess up right away and admit they do not have that training. Unfortunately, there are a few who will not and too often, it's the birds and those who love them dearly who pay the price. I am so sorry for you that you had to go through this and lose your bird but I hope maybe some of this information will be helpful to you. If you have more questions, or if you need anything else, please don't hesitate to ask. I will do the best I can for you. My thoughts are with you at this very sad time.
Patricia
Parrot C&onsultant
Published author, free lance bird behaviorist, adviser to the parrots at Sarasota Jungle Gardens.