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Ask Candy Your Own Question
Candy, Veterinary Technician
Category: Dog
Satisfied Customers: 11612
Experience:  Practicing Veterinary Technician for 26 years.Former Veterinary Practice Owner, Technician Trainer
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Hi Candy, I found a stray pregnant female who gave birth to

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Hi Candy, I found a stray pregnant female who gave birth to two kittens one week after I found her. She was tame as I could pick her up and bundle her into my car. She doesnt like to be picked up but is affectionate so I am not sure if she is naturally tame or was someone's cat at some point. One of her two kittens is tame but the male, both are fixed and are now a year old, is very wild. I know the wild male tom at the local pub likely is his father, and he looks just like him. They have all...
Hello,an welcome back.

I just have a few questions so I can better assist you.

Is he ever aggressive or is he just standoffish not wanting to be touched?

What types of toys does he have and does he have regular play time?

Does he socialize with the other cats or any humans?
Customer: replied 2 years ago.

not aggressive, more terrified, plays with toys, tunnels, cat trees, those dangley things on poles.... he socializes with his mother, only with me when i give him treats or use the pole toy. he is terrified, ears back if he looks at me, hides, runs away

Thank you .

Can this be in the genetics yes. I have a feral that I rescued at 2 weeks of age 4 years ago.She is still terrified, while I can touch her I am the only one in the house who can and she still lives in the closet only coming out when everyone has gone to bed but me.

You may be able to get him to be more accepting to you with the use of toys.
Exercise him 2-3 times per day for 20 minutes. Use either a laser pointer or the pole toys so he begins to associate you with good things. After play time he gets a treat.
Play is not only great for bonding but the exercise is the best stress reducer.

Some of this may also be due to the limited hands on contact he had as a kitten.

He may never be able to become a lab cat but as long as he is eating and will play then over time hopefully he will become more comfortable.

I know loving cats need homes too but I personally think it is these scared cats that need loving homes more as not many people would take them.

It is our nature as humans to want to coddle things but sometimes we have to realize that just because they are not cuddly does not mean they are not happy. In the wild cats are very solitary animals. They do not run in packs or need friends and in fact will only for the most part interact with other cats to breed.

I would try to engage him more with play and do not attempt to just grab him( if you do) reaching out to grab or hold still a cat that is afraid actually does the exact opposite and makes them more afraid as they can not trust your movements.

Along with the play twice daily sit on the floor where he can see you and offer treats. When he comes to take a treat do not pet him just give him the treat and allow him to walk away so he learns your hands give good things. Allow him to come to you, if he starts rubbing on you let him but do not pet and never try to hold them still.

Try this for 2 weeks and let me know how things are going. I will stick with you until we can try to get him more comfortable
Customer: replied 2 years ago.

Sadly I have done this, I have never grabbed him, have only held him a few times in a year, I give him his space, talk to him, walk by and talk, give treats by hand near him, etc. He has never become affectionate towards me like most other cats. I agree I have al in any way whatsoever. I have always taken the problem cats that nobody wanted having worked with two rescues in Idaho, but he really troubles me as for no reason whatsoever having been given birth to in a heated home, despite always living indoors, having treats, roast chicken 1x per week, wet food/dry food, and toys, he acts like an abused cat. I find it frustrating as I did not find him in an alley like pub kitty or in the middle of the road like my cat daisy as a kitten, or in front of a church starving like my wonderful but mad male pee pee kitty who pees if he is with my other cats. It makes no sense that I can think of aside from being a genetic thing you know? If his childhood was troubled I could get it, but it wasn't you know? I feel like sigmund freud!??

I know exactly how you feel. I too get frustrated with my girl from time to time. I am always so afraid she is going to hurt herself because she is like a rocket when she sees someone and has run into walls, doors etc trying to get away. Its actually very sad but I know she is happy and she just chooses to live the solitary life.

You are doing all the right things so hopefully now that you are well and can give him time this will improve. Really try the play, until I begun taking classes in behavior I never realized how much it can help. Now working with problem cats in owners homes I see how much it works.
Candy and other Dog Specialists are ready to help you
Customer: replied 2 years ago.

Hi Candy update on scaredy kitty, I was really frustrated as I was dealing with struvite kitty who is living in the laundry/kitchen until she is on food they can all eat, and trying to reintroduce petey the pee pee kitty for the second time as a gradual process with the others (he has been separate as he was awful when I tried putting him with the others, he peed EVERYWHERE last time) and then scaredy kitty was running like yours into walls and doors upsetting everyone with his jerky movements. i wanted to find someone else to take him, or even find a farm that has outside cats and could feed him. but i realize he is indeed terrified/fearful and not at all aggressive. i was so at my wits end i put him out in the 200 year old stone house outside on the property with food and a bed, but after a day realized this was the wrong thing to do, he was terrified and i had great difficulty getting him back into the carrier to bring into the house. i was mistaking fear thinking he was a cat who wanted to be an outside/farm type kitty eventually, but he would never survive that way as he is frightened of his own shadow. today i ordered a feliway plug in and sprayed a bit of it around their area as well. scaredy kitty loves to play with those wand toys of all kinds, loves whiskas treats and roast chicken, during those times he acts normally, so i have to be patient and work with him. struvite kitty is terrified of pee pee petey as he has shown dominance so i may always have one to keep separate, likely petey when she is able to be introduced as petey is lovely alone but acts dominant with other cats and sort of stalks them and pounces or swats. it is such effort as many of them i found in strange places when running errands (petey in front of a church so starving he was falling over) but i love them all, and at times when several have issues, it is enormously frustrating! thanks for the good advice though. i really need to work on scaredy kitty though as his jerky movements stress the others, he goes catapulting off things when i come in the room and it freaks them all out. when he was out of their rooms, it felt like i was walking into a zen paradise. they were all chilled and acting like kitties on some sort of mind altering kittty happy pill.


unfortunately no matter where i go on errands there seems to be a cat in need here, a kitten under the carts at the supermarket cart hub, churches, pubs, under cars seeking shelter. i have found many and was able to get them into a rescue here, but the rescues in this county are maxed and will take no more. my husband does not like cats and the last one i found was under a car and it took a while to catch it, we were on a day trip to a really cool historic town, when i caught the cat, he was fuming with me as i had to ruin the day and go home with it. when i was getting its food ready on the counter, it was so starving it jumped up on the counters edge hanging and then literally gulped the food - it was the most starving animal i had ever seen. it really affected my husband and he was no longer mad at me. i am one of those than can tell something is starving even though it has a fur coat, it can be deceiving. he is better now with my trying to help strays since that one.

Good Morning.I apologize I accidentally sent this as an answer and I can not change it. Please do not rate again

I am so glad your husband understands and is accepting now, I have seen animal ruin many relationships. I completely understand but not many people do. When you are an animal lover that feels the need to rescue that is what we do and we do not think of anything else when we find an animal that needs help. I truly believe that some of us were put here to care for the animals and no matter who gets mad we still do it.

The kitties in your area are very lucky to have you and I hope there is someone to carry on when you go.

You are absolutely right. Scardey cat is not mean or aggressive he is afraid and that is so sad that he is so scared he can not be comfortable and happy but I think if anyone can make him feel secure and happy its you

Unfortunately over population has lead to starving animals everywhere which is one of the reason I teach pet care classes in our community. We want to save them all and it breaks my heart when I have to turn one away knowing it will be euthanized in the shelter but we do the best we can and while we can not change the world alone for every animal we do change it for the ones we save

Hi Anne,

I'm just following up on our conversation about Pip. How is everything going?


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