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Hello. Welcome to JustAnswer. I am Dr Z. I'm reviewing your question now, and will post back with a reply ASAP.
This is not an uncommon problem. There really is nothing that is available over the counter that will help to calm a cat that is so anxious. You will need to have something prescribed by a veterinarian who has examined her. That leads to the question of how to even get her to a vet if you can't get her in the carrier. You have two options. First, you could enlist the services of a vet that makes house calls to examine and then prescribe something to facilitate the move. House call vets are becoming more readily available and there likely is one in your are.
Your second option is to get her to the vets office where they can then sedate her if needed. I have had some clients successfully get their cat in a carrier by either putting then in a pillow case first or calmly wrap them in a towel and then put the whole towel or pillow case in the carrier with them in it. Most cats will simply lay down on a towel of opened pillow case if you lay it out on the floor, and when they do, you simply have to calmly and gently "scoop" them up into it and insert the whole thing in the carrier.
I hope this is helpful. Please let me know if you have ANY other questions. My goal is to give you 100% satisfaction and if you are not yet satisfied, please reply so I can clarify for you.
My posted replies are for general education only and not meant as a diagnosis. Only after a thorough veterinary examination can a diagnosis for your pet be made and specific treatments be advised or medications be prescribed.