replied 1 year ago.
Hello, Zan and welcome. I'm so sorry to hear that your new addition is not being accepted by your two older cats. So far, you seem to have done many good things towards this result. I want to make sure you have exchanged scents in the way I recommend: take a very slightly dampened cloth or paper towel and pet one cat (the newbie), then one of your older cats, then pet the new cat, again. Repeat this with your other older cat and do this consistently throughout the day. In addition, take an old t-shirt of yours and pet all the cats with it; this will deposit your comforting, familiar scent on all the cats and may help the older ones feel more comfortable and less threatened. If the pheromones you've used are Feliway (not Comfort Zone) plug in diffusers, and they haven't done much, you can also use Feliway spray (lightly spray the area where they will be together, but allow to dry, completely, before allowing them access--about 30 minutes) and/or a pheromone collar which allows them to always smell the comforting pheromones. Here is more information: http://www.petsmart.com/cat/stress-anxiety-relief/sentry-good-behavior-lavender-chamomile-cat-calming-collar-zid36-13558/cat-36-catid-200050--------This is another calming pheromone collar made by a different company: http://www.entirelypets.com/naturecalmcat.html------You can also try one of two over the counter calming remedies, if you haven't, yet: Rescue Remedy for Pets and Composure treats. Only try one, do not give both simultaneously.Try to play with all the cats with some interactive toys, for example, the feather wand (fishing pole toy), and offer them cat-healthy treats when they play nicely, as a reward. You want them to associate the pleasurable activity of eating, with each other, so you know when they're together, good things happen. Note: don't leave the feather wand alone with them, as pieces may be chewed off--only use this when you are supervising play. If the younger cat is maintaining eye contact too long and you think this is like a 'challenge' to the older cats, there's not much you can do about it; she's doing what's instinctive to her. Have you seen Jackson Galaxy's article on introducing new cats? http://jacksongalaxy.com/2010/10/01/cat-to-cat-introductions/ and, here is another good one: http://www.catbehaviorassociates.com/how-to-introduce-a-second-cat/-------I don't know what medication you tried (prescription?), but Clomicalm seems to work well in these situations: http://www.petplace.com/article/drug-library/library/prescription/clomipramine-clomicalm----------Try to enrich their environment with some new toys and a tall kitty condo or cat tree (or 2, if you have the room) and this might help keep them busy: http://www.pawswhiskersandclaws.com/pwc%20foraging.pdfhttp://www.zootoo.com/pet-product/cat-toys/funkitty-twist-n-treathttp://www.batarat.com/http://www.catdvd.com/http://www.shopfatcat.com/Cat-Toys_c_7.htmlhttp://www.amazon.com/FroliCat-BOLT-Interactive-Laser-Pet/dp/B0021L8W6K-------- I completely understand your frustration and wanting to make your feline household stress-free and cohesive, but sometimes, certain cats will just not get along, sometimes, they barely 'tolerate' each other (without fighting) and believe it or not, eventually, they might become friends! The arrangement you have now, sounds like it's keeping the peace, so keep this up until you can make a little more progress with getting them together. As you know, this is a gradual process and it takes a lot of time and patience; I know you've already invested a lot of time and one day, they might surprise you and start getting along. Just remember, keep praising and rewarding them with treats--if the older cats won't go on the floor near the new cat, even when treats are offered, just try making a longer distance between them, with the treats at each end of the room. I hope things begin to improve, very soon for you and your kitties! Please be so kind as to rate my answer with positive feedback; that is the only way I receive credit for my assistance. Thank you very much!Providing a positive rating will not end our conversation, should you need me for any follow-up. Simply click 'Reply' for clarification or additional information, if needed, and I will be glad to continue.Warmest regards,Cher PS: if you reply and don't hear right back from me, your patience will be greatly appreciated, as the site is experiencing some technical difficulties in this, and some other categories and it's sometimes difficult for me to access the question. Please be assured, you are not being ignored, if you reply and don't get response within a reasonable amount of time. Thank you so much for your understanding!