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Hello, Kylie and welcome!My name is XXXXX XXXXX it will be my pleasure to help you and Steve today.I'm so sorry to hear about his unfortunate reaction to Abby. Can you tell me how you first introduced the two cats?How old is Abby?What type of personality does she have? I'm assuming both cats are fixed?Do you know where Steve goes when he's outside? Does he roam or stay close to the house?How does he react to the spray bottle?Thanks for all your additional detail.Cher
When you get the new toys, divide them into several groups. Change out the groups every few days, and they will feel like they are getting 'new' toys, which will intrigue them!You should have or can get, a tall kitty condo or cat tree with different levels, shelves, and 'hidey holes' for playing, sleeping and scratching (these are covered with carpet). They will also enjoy a foraging toy, which fulfills the natural instincts of stalking and hunting prey.Interactive toys you can play with them are laser pointers and feather dancers or fishing pole toys. There are even 'automatic' laser toys which you can set on a timer. Foraging toys
http://www.catdvd.com/ http://www.shopfatcat.com/Cat-Toys_c_7.htmlhttp://www.amazon.com/FroliCat-BOLT-Interactive-Laser-Pet/dp/B0021L8W6KThese are some examples of what's available; you can find many of these types of toys, etc. at your pet supplies store or order online--whichever is easiest for you.One note: re: the feather dancer/fishing pole toy--don't leave this alone with them, as pieces can be chewed off; always play WITH them, under your supervision, then store the toy where they can't get at it.
I agree with you that keeping him in, when Steve is used to being an indoor/outdoor cat may be adding to his stress and new, angry personality. I also understand that you're afraid he might not come home one day. If you're able, put up a safe cat enclosure or a cat fence that will keep him in the yard, etc., but not allow him off your property. Here are some examples: http://www.purrfectfence.com/
I always prefer to recommend a prescription anti-anxiety medication from the vet as a last resort. If nothing else seems to work for Steve, discuss this option with his vet, just to use short-term, to see if it helps him get used to Abby and be less angry. I wouldn't let him outdoors while he's on this type of medication, though.
I hope things start to improve for Steve and Abby very soon. I know how difficult this situation is for you, but hopefully, he'll come around.
Thank you for your thorough response. Things are a little bit better, but I haven't tried anything you suggested. My biggest issue with your suggestions is the constant suggestion that I buy something...or can be home all the time. I have been more consistent in firmly telling Steve, "NO!" when he growls, hisses, but I am not home all the time. I love my cats and I want them to get along, but these suggestions seem ridiculously outlandish as far as the time and cost requirement. I can't afford a cat run..nor should I Have to go out and buy a whole new repertoire of toys, cat scratchers, etc.