Hi again, and thanks for your patience.
I'd like to address each incident separately. When you're grooming Sammy, even though he loves it, sometimes cats can become 'overstimulated' by petting or grooming for a period of even a short time, to a point where their skin is almost painful. This may be why he attacks while you're grooming him. From now on, time your grooming sessions, and only brush him for about 2 minutes at a time, and see if this will prevent the biting and scratching. If he continues to do it, brush him for 1 minute and then stop. See how that goes.
Re: the wheelchair--if he doesn't like to be picked up (many cats don't) and gives you trouble about being removed from the wheelchair, keep the chair inaccessible to him, or if that is not possible, because you need it near you, pile some things on the seat, that won't be comfortable for him to lay on, like some books or a lightweight box. If the seat is not 'attractive' to him, he will not want to lay there. Make sure Sammy has a cozy, fluffy bed to sleep in and place one of your old t-shirts or another piece of soft clothing in it, so he has your scent near. That's probably why he likes laying on the seat of your wheelchair.
I don't think Sammy has anger deep down; I think he does have a little bit of a stubborn streak, and as you suspect, likes things his way. Most cats are like this, but some are more timid and/or accepting of their 'parents' rules.
Tell your husband not to give Sammy extra food, especially if he is becoming a little pudgy, because overweight cats can develop health problems. He still young, so he has a chance to eat the right amount, get his exercise with his toys, etc., and not fall into that trap of being obese and developing diabetes or other health problems.
Your bedtime routine sounds great! I'm so glad you have that quiet, affectionate time with Sammy and he doesn't attack, then! : )
I hope all will be well with your furry boy!
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