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Cher
Cher, Teacher
Category: Parenting
Satisfied Customers: 86
Experience:  Extensive Experience working with Children/Teens; M.A. Teacher/Tutor 40+ yrs.; Parent of 2
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How can I break my son from his bad behaviour. I don't want

Customer Question

How can I break my son from his bad behaviour. I don't want it to rub off on his little sister
Submitted: 1 year ago.
Category: Parenting
Expert:  therapist325 replied 1 year ago.
Hello-hoping to help with your question a little. I know it can be hard for a parent when one child is struggling with some behaviors. One thing I like to tell parents when looking for changes in behavior is to be reasonable. Children will change their behavior but it doesn't always happen overnight. I think the best route is to start to look at what behavior you would like to change first and focus on that (physical behaviors are usually the one you want to start with if this is something he is struggling with). Setting up boundaries and clear consequences are a good start. Making sure that the language used is something that they will not walk away from without understanding is key. Focusing on his strengths set these goals for him with positive consequences that will make him find the goals worth reaching. It is important to give him choices that focus not just on the negative but also the positive. Hope that makes sense. What do you think so far?
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
My son is older he is almost 9. I have had a problem with him cursing, hitting , and having out of control tantrums. My daughter is only 20 months old and she really looks up to her big brother and I don't want her to think it is alright to act and treat people like that.
Expert:  therapist325 replied 1 year ago.
I can understand that you would not want that behavior to be viewed as acceptable and I am sure that you are frustrated with that behavior as well. Do you notice a trigger to the behaviors (like not getting his way, behaviors coming up when he has to do something he doesn't want to, etc)? Sometimes knowing the trigger (which there may be more than one) can help you set up a boundary prior to the situation. There are some books that give some great ideas for how to parent a child that is struggling with defiant behaviors. Would you like me to send you the names of a few?