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Elliott, LPCC, NCC
Elliott, LPCC, NCC, Psychotherapist
Category: Parenting
Satisfied Customers: 7664
Experience:  35 years of experience as a Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor, National Certified Counselor and a college professor.
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Hello, I have a 7 year old grandson who is interrupting in

Customer Question

Hello, I have a 7 year old grandson who is interrupting in class, talking back at his daycare and hitting other children, he is in jeopardy of being suspended from his daycare.
We live in a very rural area and there are no child psychologists. I am very worried about my grandson. I do know that his father is a bully and slaps and hits him quite often.
Thank you for any offering of advise.
Submitted: 3 years ago.
Category: Parenting
Expert:  Elliott, LPCC, NCC replied 3 years ago.

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

Seeking expert testimony is a sign of strength. A personal relationship with a caring professional is proven clinically effective.

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

Dear friend,

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

I believe that I can help

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

I know that this behavior must be very disturbing to you and to his mom.

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

Unfortunately he is learning this behavior directly from his father.

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

His father solves frustrations by hitting and this is the way be has learned to deal with his frustrations.

Customer :

So...what do we do? He lives with his father 1/2 of the time.

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

If the father is abusing him then you will have to get proof (witnesses or hidden mini cameras) and take hims to court and change the visitation rights.

Customer :

I have reported this man to the child protection agency here in our county, we have tried to get full custody and the courts will not comply. Even if we did try to get custody it takes forever. What do I do with my grandson in the meantime?

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

You need to take him to a child psychologist not only to give him guidance, but to begin a court case against the father by accumulating evidence and having an expert witness being cultivated.

Customer :

He has also told me he slaps him in the face and begged me not to tell his father.

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

That is grounds enough to charge him with child abuse. There must be away to record this, even with a hidden microphone in the boy's toys.

Customer :

Is that admissible in court? In California?

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

That is a legal question. Let me see if I can find out. If it is not, then it would certainly influence child protection if they heard such a recording.

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

If there are any scars or bruise then this WOULD be very admissable.

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

It is NOT legal in California in court but could still sway the actions of child protection.

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

http://criminal-law.freeadvice.com/criminal-law/criminal-law/surreptitious_tape.htm

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

I suggest establishing a relationship with a child psychologist (not psychiatrist); the young man may have Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD).

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

I would also work as closely as possible with your local child protection.

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

Recording devices put in by them under court order ARE admissable, if yours would do that.

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

They need to interview the boy some more.

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

I hope that some of this information is helpful to you in protecting the young man. You are definitely doing the correct thing to pursue this.

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

Why would you give me bad service after spending so much time giving you encouraging advice?

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

I don't bully your grandson and you must protect him by dedoubling your efforts

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

Do you expect magic results? You are the ones that must deal with it and I have given you ideas and encouragement. GIving me a bad rating on my record for my kindness and my time will not help you except maybe to keep you from taking action.

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

Please continue the chat when you are ready.

Customer :

If you paid ANY attention to my initial question you would have seen something VERY important in there...thank you...I'm done!!!

Customer :

There are no child psychologists here!

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

He is a victim of child abuse and you just want to be angry with me.