Seeking expert testimony is a sign of strength. A personal relationship with a caring professional is proven clinically effective.
I believe that I can help you
I hear how terribly frustrated you are.
She is very young and is exploring her world
You are not spanking her and that is good that you can exercise self restraint.
However, yelling her intensely is very much like spanking and can harm her as much and that is why she is throwing things.
You are teaching her anger.\
You could either find a therapist to learn anger management, or you can use one of several excellent workbooks that can guide you very gently but surely to change your thinking and behavior.
Let me recommend a workbook.
No it is not too late.
As your behavior changes she will regain her confidence in you and lose any fear that she might have developed.
The book I recommended has been very helpful for several of my clients and I believe it will help you. You have to stick with the program, and that is not hard.
You will regain any lost ground. Your daughter always loves you and she should not ever fear you.
You are doing the right thing to seek help. That is half the battle already won.
You will succeed because it is exactly what you want to do.
I shall keep you in my prayers for success.
I do too ! :)