How JustAnswer Works:

  • Ask an Expert
    Experts are full of valuable knowledge and are ready to help with any question. Credentials confirmed by a Fortune 500 verification firm.
  • Get a Professional Answer
    Via email, text message, or notification as you wait on our site.
    Ask follow up questions if you need to.
  • 100% Satisfaction Guarantee
    Rate the answer you receive.

Ask Elliott, LPCC, NCC Your Own Question

Elliott, LPCC, NCC
Elliott, LPCC, NCC, Psychotherapist
Category: Parenting
Satisfied Customers: 7662
Experience:  35 years of experience as a Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor, National Certified Counselor and a college professor.
40019946
Type Your Parenting Question Here...
Elliott, LPCC, NCC is online now
A new question is answered every 9 seconds

I am at my wits end with my 5 year old who just started kindergarten

Customer Question

I am at my wits end with my 5 year old who just started kindergarten last month. Here is a note I received from his teacher today.

Tristan choose this morning to exhibit disrespectful behavior to a substitute we had in our room while I was in a district meeting. Our sub was talking to Tristan about the importance of practicing reading skills after Tristan was choosing to play with his independent reading books instead of read them. Tristan covered his ears with his hands, began making “blah, blah, blah” noises, and twisting his arms back and forth.

His other disruptive behaviors such as spitting noises and hitting others continued as well.


Please help
Submitted: 12 months ago.
Category: Parenting
Expert:  Elliott, LPCC, NCC replied 12 months ago.

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

Seeking expert testimony is a sign of strength. A personal relationship with a caring professional is proven clinically effective.

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

Dear concerned parent,

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

Tristan is only five years old and is an intelligent and independent young boy.

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

When a new teacher enters the scene as a substitute, he or she must first establish authority with the children in a positive manner.

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

It seems that this teacher may have come on too strongly to your son who was being creative with his books, but not in the way that the teacher wanted.

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

She could have gone along with his playing and then when she established more rapport could have moved on to showing him how to read the books as well.

Customer:

Ok. I did want to add that we just adopted a newborn, this all happened very quickly and we did not have much time to prepare him for the baby's arrival.

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

He is intelligent, creative, and does not like be ordered about by a stranger.

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

NOW, you have gotten to the core of the matter. THIS is the essential reason for his acting out.

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

He feels abandoned and somewhat betrayed, and no words can make up for the jealousy and resentment that he feels by the arrival of the new baby, without preparation.

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

His reaction is quite normal and you must make an extraordinary effort to make him feel secure again.

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

I have a book or two in my file that would help immensely.

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

Please give me a few moments.

Customer:

thank you so much!

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

There is a great DVD for children, first of all:

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :


and a lovely book

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :


These two resources will go a long way.

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

Do not punish Tristan. He needs EXTRA love and support.

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

Explain to his teacher the situation and that you have now become aware of the problem and are talking positive steps to reinforce his position as the number one child and beloved son.

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

He WILL need an understanding teacher as well. The sub probably went beyond her boundaries and over-reacted to him, while Tristan is also upset, confused, and feels a bit lost now.

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

You shall overcome this by giving him plenty of attention and directing him into the role of big brother (but do it gently and slowly and make him your ally).

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

I wish you great success and shall keep you in my prayers.

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

Warm regards,

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

Elliott, MAE, LPCC, NCC, CCMHC

Customer:

Thank you! This makes me feel so much better. We were starting to question ourselves as parents. We'll get these books right away

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

That sounds soooo wonderful. You are exceptional parents for you have given a life and home to an abandoned child. May God bless your family.

Customer:

Thank you again :)

Elliott, LPCC, NCC, Psychotherapist
Category: Parenting
Satisfied Customers: 7662
Experience: 35 years of experience as a Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor, National Certified Counselor and a college professor.
Elliott, LPCC, NCC and other Parenting Specialists are ready to help you

JustAnswer in the News:

 
 
 
Ask-a-doc Web sites: If you've got a quick question, you can try to get an answer from sites that say they have various specialists on hand to give quick answers... Justanswer.com.
JustAnswer.com...has seen a spike since October in legal questions from readers about layoffs, unemployment and severance.
Web sites like justanswer.com/legal
...leave nothing to chance.
Traffic on JustAnswer rose 14 percent...and had nearly 400,000 page views in 30 days...inquiries related to stress, high blood pressure, drinking and heart pain jumped 33 percent.
Tory Johnson, GMA Workplace Contributor, discusses work-from-home jobs, such as JustAnswer in which verified Experts answer people’s questions.
I will tell you that...the things you have to go through to be an Expert are quite rigorous.
 
 
 

What Customers are Saying:

 
 
 
  • Wonderful service, prompt, efficient, and accurate. Couldn't have asked for more. I cannot thank you enough for your help. Mary C. Freshfield, Liverpool, UK
< Last | Next >
  • Wonderful service, prompt, efficient, and accurate. Couldn't have asked for more. I cannot thank you enough for your help. Mary C. Freshfield, Liverpool, UK
  • This expert is wonderful. They truly know what they are talking about, and they actually care about you. They really helped put my nerves at ease. Thank you so much!!!! Alex Los Angeles, CA
  • Thank you for all your help. It is nice to know that this service is here for people like myself, who need answers fast and are not sure who to consult. GP Hesperia, CA
  • I couldn't be more satisfied! This is the site I will always come to when I need a second opinion. Justin Kernersville, NC
  • Just let me say that this encounter has been entirely professional and most helpful. I liked that I could ask additional questions and get answered in a very short turn around. Esther Woodstock, NY
  • Thank you so much for taking your time and knowledge to support my concerns. Not only did you answer my questions, you even took it a step further with replying with more pertinent information I needed to know. Robin Elkton, Maryland
  • He answered my question promptly and gave me accurate, detailed information. If all of your experts are half as good, you have a great thing going here. Diane Dallas, TX
 
 
 

Meet The Experts:

 
 
 
  • Rafael M.T.Therapist

    Family Counselor

    Satisfied Customers:

    108
    MHT-MHRS-MS-MA Integral Psychotherapist & Life Coach
< Last | Next >
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/IN/intrapsyc.com/2012-2-20_161928_RGMTPicturex5002012.64x64.png Rafael M.T.Therapist's Avatar

    Rafael M.T.Therapist

    Family Counselor

    Satisfied Customers:

    108
    MHT-MHRS-MS-MA Integral Psychotherapist & Life Coach
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/jhollo77/2010-2-6_651_Avatar.jpg Jennifer's Avatar

    Jennifer

    School Psychologist

    Satisfied Customers:

    77
    Collaborative parent consultation on everything from modifying behavior to child development.
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/VO/vodkas25/2012-1-29_16528_P1010831.64x64.JPG professional_Alison's Avatar

    professional_Alison

    Child Care

    Satisfied Customers:

    77
    Degree in early years,16 years experience in childcare
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/HU/hungryjack20/IMG_1281_edit_2.64x64.jpg Dr. L's Avatar

    Dr. L

    Psychologist

    Satisfied Customers:

    40
    Licensed as psychologist and marriage and family therapist
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/KA/KaterB1270/2012-5-2_17226_016.64x64.jpg KaterB1270's Avatar

    KaterB1270

    Teacher

    Satisfied Customers:

    18
    BS Family Consumer Sciences Ed. and Masters of Art in Teaching
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/KA/Kansastherapist/2012-6-13_171911_4upon20120220at14.64x64.jpg KansasTherapist's Avatar

    KansasTherapist

    LSCSW

    Satisfied Customers:

    17
    17 years experience with depression, abuse, and borderline.
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/HE/heidi1107/2012-2-18_15325_Heidi.64x64.jpg Heidi LPC's Avatar

    Heidi LPC

    Psychotherapist

    Satisfied Customers:

    16
    Licensed Professional Counselor