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JACUSTOMER-jkqny9ef-
JACUSTOMER-jkqny9ef-, Teacher
Category: Parenting
Satisfied Customers: 20
Experience:  K-12 teacher w/ licenses from NV, FL and OH
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My 10 yr old has been friends with 3 girls at school who seem

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My 10 yr old has been friends with 3 girls at school who seem to team up against each other every other week. she is always coming home upset.Now she is begging me to have them for a slumber party for her birthday but im not thrilled about this combo of girls...appparently im the meanest mother ever! What should i do-give in?

JACUSTOMER-jkqny9ef- : Hello, I hope I can help you get some understanding of you situation.
Customer:

thank you i hope so too

JACUSTOMER-jkqny9ef- : Normally with girls this age there is a ring leader of the group.
JACUSTOMER-jkqny9ef- : The ring leader must keep conflict to keep control.
Customer:

I know its not my daughter.she is very good friends with one of them and it is usually one of the other 2 that are mean to her

JACUSTOMER-jkqny9ef- : How does your daughter feel when the conflicts occur.
JACUSTOMER-jkqny9ef- : Does she want to get back into their good graces or is she happy to keep her distance?
Customer:

She says she trys to resolve it and then comes home really upset.I have talked with the teacher and tried to encourage her to hang out with other girls but she continues to go back to these 3 girls. I finally said i could give her advice but it was uo to her to decide at school how she was willing to be treated

JACUSTOMER-jkqny9ef- : I would maybe suggest to her to have a slumber party with the the friend that treats her well and help develop that relationship.
Customer:

She never seems to keep her distance.She says if she is not friends with the 1 girl she will have to stop being friend with the other one because they have been bffs for years

Customer:

Thats what i suggestedI said if she wanted to be with theses girls at school that it was her decision, but i don't really want to encourage these other friendships. i just wondered if that was the right decision?

JACUSTOMER-jkqny9ef- : She can use you as the excuse, by saying that you will only allow one friend over. Not knowing the group, I would guess one of them is the leader and the others are afraid that if they betray her they will be on the outs with the rest of them.
Customer:

ok thats what i will do-thanks.Hopefully my daughter will thank me for this in the long run.Hoping they will be in different classes next year but i guess it can always happen in any group of girls UGGH!

JACUSTOMER-jkqny9ef- : My opinion is that you holding firm is the right decision. You can't control how she is treated at school, however you will not encourage her to be in situations were she is potentially not respected.
Customer:

Thank you that is how i felt as well

JACUSTOMER-jkqny9ef- : Let me know if there is anything else I can help you with.
Customer:

thank you...

JACUSTOMER-jkqny9ef- and other Parenting Specialists are ready to help you
Just checking in, Remember the anger you are seeing will last awhile, but the values you are instiling will last a lifetime. Good luck.

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