How JustAnswer Works:

  • Ask an Expert
    Experts are full of valuable knowledge and are ready to help with any question. Credentials confirmed by a Fortune 500 verification firm.
  • Get a Professional Answer
    Via email, text message, or notification as you wait on our site.
    Ask follow up questions if you need to.
  • 100% Satisfaction Guarantee
    Rate the answer you receive.

Ask JACUSTOMER-jkqny9ef- Your Own Question

JACUSTOMER-jkqny9ef-
JACUSTOMER-jkqny9ef-, Teacher
Category: Parenting
Satisfied Customers: 20
Experience:  K-12 teacher w/ licenses from NV, FL and OH
66519654
Type Your Parenting Question Here...
JACUSTOMER-jkqny9ef- is online now
A new question is answered every 9 seconds

My 6.5 year old boy (1st born) dropped a box of toy money with

Customer Question

My 6.5 year old boy (1st born) dropped a box of toy money with different values of coins and paper money on the floor and the pieces were all over the place. He cried and asked for help to put them back the grids. By the way, we know he can do it himself and he is smart and he learned that skills in the school, too.

We told him he needed to pick up the brown ones (pennies) which is just one kind of many kinds and then we can help him with the rest. He heard that and kept whining "I need help and I don't know how to sort them all."

We said, "That is fine. You just do the brown ones (pennies). We'll help you with others."

He kept crying "why don't you help me now."

We said, "we will help you after you do the brown ones."

He kept saying "I need help."

We repeated "Can you do the brown ones? It is not difficult and you know how to do it."

"But I need help. I do not how to do sort them."

"It's ok, don't worry about the others now. we will help you with other money. You would need to pick up the brown ones first. Then we will help you."

"But I want to you help me now. Why don't you help me now? I don't know how to sort them."

"It is your responsibility to pick them up. You need to do the brown ones first and we will help you."

"But I don't know how to sort them."

"You don't need to do others. Just pick up the brown ones."

... on and on and on.

At the same time, the younger son (4.5) went there and picked up the brown ones and put them to where they were.

Sorry for the long post. My question is: what did the older son really want? why didn't him go to do the brown ones as we told him to instead keep saying "I want help"?

Thank you for your help in advance :)
Submitted: 1 year ago.
Category: Parenting
Expert:  JACUSTOMER-jkqny9ef- replied 1 year ago.

It sounds like it could be a combination of things that could have provoked this reaction for your 6.5 year old. He could have be overwhelmed by the mistake itself (stuck in the mistake) and frustrated that he has to repeat the work already done.

Your son could have been overwhelmed by the scale of the task, not seeing a way to start the project (even with your suggestion).

I would have suggested at the moment, seeing his frustration, to chunk the task into smaller pieces. Ask him to pick up three of each kind and then ask for three more or if his brother was picking up the pennies, make a game out of it. Who can pick up the most coins in 1 minute. If neither of this ideas worked, I would get him to walk away from the situation and get a drink or complete another task to remove him from the emotion of the situation.

If the moment continues to be a problem and/or is a success, I would talk to him a little bit after the incident with him about how he was feeling, how he dealt with it and commending him about what he accomplished.

JACUSTOMER-jkqny9ef-, Teacher
Category: Parenting
Satisfied Customers: 20
Experience: K-12 teacher w/ licenses from NV, FL and OH
JACUSTOMER-jkqny9ef- and 2 other Parenting Specialists are ready to help you
Customer: replied 1 year ago.

Thank you for your reply. It seems he was resisting to go to the accident spot by himself and he wanted someone to go with him.

Expert:  JACUSTOMER-jkqny9ef- replied 1 year ago.

Sounds like a great teaching moment to build confidence and how to handle adversity. If there is anything else I can help you with, let me know.

JustAnswer in the News:

 
 
 
Ask-a-doc Web sites: If you've got a quick question, you can try to get an answer from sites that say they have various specialists on hand to give quick answers... Justanswer.com.
JustAnswer.com...has seen a spike since October in legal questions from readers about layoffs, unemployment and severance.
Web sites like justanswer.com/legal
...leave nothing to chance.
Traffic on JustAnswer rose 14 percent...and had nearly 400,000 page views in 30 days...inquiries related to stress, high blood pressure, drinking and heart pain jumped 33 percent.
Tory Johnson, GMA Workplace Contributor, discusses work-from-home jobs, such as JustAnswer in which verified Experts answer people’s questions.
I will tell you that...the things you have to go through to be an Expert are quite rigorous.
 
 
 

What Customers are Saying:

 
 
 
  • Wonderful service, prompt, efficient, and accurate. Couldn't have asked for more. I cannot thank you enough for your help. Mary C. Freshfield, Liverpool, UK
< Last | Next >
  • Wonderful service, prompt, efficient, and accurate. Couldn't have asked for more. I cannot thank you enough for your help. Mary C. Freshfield, Liverpool, UK
  • This expert is wonderful. They truly know what they are talking about, and they actually care about you. They really helped put my nerves at ease. Thank you so much!!!! Alex Los Angeles, CA
  • Thank you for all your help. It is nice to know that this service is here for people like myself, who need answers fast and are not sure who to consult. GP Hesperia, CA
  • I couldn't be more satisfied! This is the site I will always come to when I need a second opinion. Justin Kernersville, NC
  • Just let me say that this encounter has been entirely professional and most helpful. I liked that I could ask additional questions and get answered in a very short turn around. Esther Woodstock, NY
  • Thank you so much for taking your time and knowledge to support my concerns. Not only did you answer my questions, you even took it a step further with replying with more pertinent information I needed to know. Robin Elkton, Maryland
  • He answered my question promptly and gave me accurate, detailed information. If all of your experts are half as good, you have a great thing going here. Diane Dallas, TX
 
 
 

Meet The Experts:

 
 
 
  • Rafael M.T.Therapist

    Family Counselor

    Satisfied Customers:

    108
    MHT-MHRS-MS-MA Integral Psychotherapist & Life Coach
< Last | Next >
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/IN/intrapsyc.com/2012-2-20_161928_RGMTPicturex5002012.64x64.png Rafael M.T.Therapist's Avatar

    Rafael M.T.Therapist

    Family Counselor

    Satisfied Customers:

    108
    MHT-MHRS-MS-MA Integral Psychotherapist & Life Coach
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/jhollo77/2010-2-6_651_Avatar.jpg Jennifer's Avatar

    Jennifer

    School Psychologist

    Satisfied Customers:

    77
    Collaborative parent consultation on everything from modifying behavior to child development.
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/VO/vodkas25/2012-1-29_16528_P1010831.64x64.JPG professional_Alison's Avatar

    professional_Alison

    Child Care

    Satisfied Customers:

    77
    Degree in early years,16 years experience in childcare
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/HU/hungryjack20/IMG_1281_edit_2.64x64.jpg Dr. L's Avatar

    Dr. L

    Psychologist

    Satisfied Customers:

    40
    Licensed as psychologist and marriage and family therapist
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/KA/KaterB1270/2012-5-2_17226_016.64x64.jpg KaterB1270's Avatar

    KaterB1270

    Teacher

    Satisfied Customers:

    18
    BS Family Consumer Sciences Ed. and Masters of Art in Teaching
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/KA/Kansastherapist/2012-6-13_171911_4upon20120220at14.64x64.jpg KansasTherapist's Avatar

    KansasTherapist

    LSCSW

    Satisfied Customers:

    17
    17 years experience with depression, abuse, and borderline.
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/HE/heidi1107/2012-2-18_15325_Heidi.64x64.jpg Heidi LPC's Avatar

    Heidi LPC

    Psychotherapist

    Satisfied Customers:

    16
    Licensed Professional Counselor