Hi, Based on what it seems is you do watch your son a lot plus there is a Nanny. This may be why there may not even be a need to watch him while she is there since that could be her time with him. However, I do understand if say on the weekend you both are together and she would like you to have a chance watching him. I agree with you that both of you need to be on the same page with discipline. You may need to discipline him when your wife is there for your son to learn that he can not treat you like that just cause mommy is there and he needs to respect you regardless. An idea of something you can do is to discuss with your wife how you both will discipline in order to be on the same page that way your time all together will certainly be a lot better. Also, when she is there and you want to spend time with him try getting his attention with something he likes and go into a different room or even outside if possible. Put on some music or even a show he likes to start just to grab his attention. If he sees his mom he will want her so better out if site. This is quite normal since at this age children are attached to their mom. Wait until he is around 3 it may be the other way around :). I wish you the best and please let me know if I can further help you.