Hi, I am so sorry this happened to you twice. As Mom it is so easy to fall into trap of wanting to help them and feeling bad to not that allowing them to take advantage, not learn and grow while taking advantage of us is always a high possibility. This is why it is important to not only use our hearts, but our minds as well. In this situation I feel that is what you are doing and I commend you for that. I understand how these options you are wanting to present to him must be so difficult for you, but I agree and think you are on the right track. By doing that you are showing him that you are there for him, but he needs to show responsibility and make some changes in order to stay with you. I think that is more than fair and feel you should go through with that. I also would no longer allow him to use your card since he has shown he can not be trusted. If he does not go long with what you say you should not feel that you are wrong and give in even though the temptation may be there because then he will not learn nor grow from this. I truly wish you well in this difficult time and please let me know if I can be of further help to you.