How JustAnswer Works:

  • Ask an Expert
    Experts are full of valuable knowledge and are ready to help with any question. Credentials confirmed by a Fortune 500 verification firm.
  • Get a Professional Answer
    Via email, text message, or notification as you wait on our site.
    Ask follow up questions if you need to.
  • 100% Satisfaction Guarantee
    Rate the answer you receive.

Ask earthsister Your Own Question

earthsister
earthsister, Parent
Category: Parenting
Satisfied Customers: 141
Experience:  Home Child Care Provider, and mother of 4; two pre-teen boys and twin baby girls.
Type Your Parenting Question Here...
earthsister is online now
A new question is answered every 9 seconds

when is the best time to tell children (ages 6 and 5) that

Customer Question

when is the best time to tell children (ages 6 and 5) that you are getting a divorce? What is the message you tell them?
Submitted: 1 year ago.
Category: Parenting
Expert:  professional_Alison replied 1 year ago.

professional_Alison : Hello there, may I help you? Telling children that you are splitting up is never easy. The most important thing to emphasise is that although mummy and daddy will not be living together anymore ,they still love them very much and will always love them. Make it sound exciting that they will have two homes whether based with the mother or the father make sure te children know they will still see the other parent. If they children ask questions about the divorce try to answer honestly but with age appropriate vocabulary. So if you get a question like don't you love mummy/daddy anymore you say mummy and daddy will always be friends but we just can't live together anymore. There are some great books available on amazon about parents splitting up and divorce for the age of your children. The most important thing is to provide reassurance and love and never bad mouth the other parent as this would cause distress and confusion. I wish you the very best, do come back to me if I can help you further.
Expert:  earthsister replied 1 year ago.
Good morning. I would like to provide my suggestion for when you should tell your children about your divorce. I think that it is a wise decision to tell your children as soon as possible after the decision has been made; even adults have a hard time adjusting to sudden and big changes, which this will definitely be one for your children, and so I suggest that you allow them the proper time to be able to adjust to this huge change by preparing them well in advance. I think that along with much of what the previous professional suggested, it is important that you convey the message to them that the two of you are splitting up because of differences between the two of you, and that the reasons have nothing at all to do with them. It is not uncommon for children this age to question how they may have caused the break-up. Encourage them to ask questions to help them understand; and let them know that all though the two of you have differences that has brought on the divorce, what you do have in common is the love that you have for them, and that you will work together twice as hard, as Mommy and Daddy (let them know that hasn't changed); to help them learn, grow, and be happy. If either of your children begin to show signs of depression; bed wetting, sleeping issues, trouble at school, etc. be sure to consult your child's doctor, or a professional therapist who may be able to provide assistance to your family. I do hope that my answer has been of some help. If you have any comments or need clarification about my answer, please message for "earthsister." Thanks.

JustAnswer in the News:

 
 
 
Ask-a-doc Web sites: If you've got a quick question, you can try to get an answer from sites that say they have various specialists on hand to give quick answers... Justanswer.com.
JustAnswer.com...has seen a spike since October in legal questions from readers about layoffs, unemployment and severance.
Web sites like justanswer.com/legal
...leave nothing to chance.
Traffic on JustAnswer rose 14 percent...and had nearly 400,000 page views in 30 days...inquiries related to stress, high blood pressure, drinking and heart pain jumped 33 percent.
Tory Johnson, GMA Workplace Contributor, discusses work-from-home jobs, such as JustAnswer in which verified Experts answer people’s questions.
I will tell you that...the things you have to go through to be an Expert are quite rigorous.
 
 
 

What Customers are Saying:

 
 
 
  • Wonderful service, prompt, efficient, and accurate. Couldn't have asked for more. I cannot thank you enough for your help. Mary C. Freshfield, Liverpool, UK
< Last | Next >
  • Wonderful service, prompt, efficient, and accurate. Couldn't have asked for more. I cannot thank you enough for your help. Mary C. Freshfield, Liverpool, UK
  • This expert is wonderful. They truly know what they are talking about, and they actually care about you. They really helped put my nerves at ease. Thank you so much!!!! Alex Los Angeles, CA
  • Thank you for all your help. It is nice to know that this service is here for people like myself, who need answers fast and are not sure who to consult. GP Hesperia, CA
  • I couldn't be more satisfied! This is the site I will always come to when I need a second opinion. Justin Kernersville, NC
  • Just let me say that this encounter has been entirely professional and most helpful. I liked that I could ask additional questions and get answered in a very short turn around. Esther Woodstock, NY
  • Thank you so much for taking your time and knowledge to support my concerns. Not only did you answer my questions, you even took it a step further with replying with more pertinent information I needed to know. Robin Elkton, Maryland
  • He answered my question promptly and gave me accurate, detailed information. If all of your experts are half as good, you have a great thing going here. Diane Dallas, TX
 
 
 

Meet The Experts:

 
 
 
  • Rafael M.T.Therapist

    Family Counselor

    Satisfied Customers:

    108
    MHT-MHRS-MS-MA Integral Psychotherapist & Life Coach
< Last | Next >
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/IN/intrapsyc.com/2012-2-20_161928_RGMTPicturex5002012.64x64.png Rafael M.T.Therapist's Avatar

    Rafael M.T.Therapist

    Family Counselor

    Satisfied Customers:

    108
    MHT-MHRS-MS-MA Integral Psychotherapist & Life Coach
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/jhollo77/2010-2-6_651_Avatar.jpg Jennifer's Avatar

    Jennifer

    School Psychologist

    Satisfied Customers:

    77
    Collaborative parent consultation on everything from modifying behavior to child development.
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/VO/vodkas25/2012-1-29_16528_P1010831.64x64.JPG professional_Alison's Avatar

    professional_Alison

    Child Care

    Satisfied Customers:

    77
    Degree in early years,16 years experience in childcare
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/HU/hungryjack20/IMG_1281_edit_2.64x64.jpg Dr. L's Avatar

    Dr. L

    Psychologist

    Satisfied Customers:

    40
    Licensed as psychologist and marriage and family therapist
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/KA/KaterB1270/2012-5-2_17226_016.64x64.jpg KaterB1270's Avatar

    KaterB1270

    Teacher

    Satisfied Customers:

    18
    BS Family Consumer Sciences Ed. and Masters of Art in Teaching
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/KA/Kansastherapist/2012-6-13_171911_4upon20120220at14.64x64.jpg KansasTherapist's Avatar

    KansasTherapist

    LSCSW

    Satisfied Customers:

    17
    17 years experience with depression, abuse, and borderline.
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/JA/JACUSTOMERbryjz898/2012-5-23_93829_me2.64x64.jpg Adviser Mills C.C.D.'s Avatar

    Adviser Mills C.C.D.

    Child Care

    Satisfied Customers:

    15
    15 years Plus, Preschool Owner, Teen Mentor