Hello, I am Rafael. Thanks for asking your question - I'm here to support you. (Information posted here is not private or confidential but public).
This period in a teenager's life is challenging for them and for parents, even more if there are two families where he has been raised with very different parenting styles.
most times the best, XXXXX XXXXX option is also the hardest one, since it requires harder work, effort, patience and understanding, dealing with issues and resistance. Your son would always prefer to stay at a home where his ego is freer to do as it pleases, but as you know, that would not help him to take good care of himself and life.if you truly want to set his well-being and development as number one priorities, then you would stick to set better boundaries and limits for him to religiously comply with. Once he gets 18 if he chooses to waste his time, life and opportunities doing what is unhealthy, then it will be %100 his responsibility and not yours.
This period is for you to model, teach and offer the best mature support you could get as an individual, mother and family. He chooses what he would do with it but as long as depending on you and staying there, he needs to respect and comply with your rules.
Does it make sense?