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earthsister
earthsister, Parent
Category: Parenting
Satisfied Customers: 141
Experience:  Home Child Care Provider, and mother of 4; two pre-teen boys and twin baby girls.
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my four and a half year old daughter is showing an indifferent

Customer Question

my four and a half year old daughter is showing an indifferent attitude to toiletting, soiling her pants despite being reminded to go to the toilet. i don't believe in smacking and my current tactic of withholding the bedtime story as punishment won't carry weight for much longer. she starts big school in september and I'm worried she will be teased. any ideas as to how i deal with this please
Submitted: 2 years ago.
Category: Parenting
Expert:  earthsister replied 2 years ago.

earthsister :

Good afternoon I would like to assist you today.

Customer:

hello, have you any suggestions in regard to my daughter's issue?

earthsister :

Have you tried to encourage your daughter to use the potty by giving her rewards for going to the potty as opposed to punishment for not doing it?

Customer:

she hasn't used a potty for nearly a year now, this is regression

earthsister :

So she once was using the potty?

Customer:

she uses the toilet and wipes her own bottom

earthsister :

Have you discussed this issue with her pediatrician to ensure that there are no physical or serious psychological problems that may be causing this regression?

earthsister :

The reason that I ask, is because sometimes parents will think that a child is just being difficult, when really the problem is deeper. Here is a link for example, that explains a possible concern, Encopresis (also called soiling), which happens generally to children 4 or older:http://kidshealth.org/parent/general/sick/encopresis.html?tracking=P_RelatedArticle#

Customer:

i'd also taken into account that we have recently moved into a new house with my partner, just returned from a two week trip to france and the arrival of a new half sister on her dad's side may well have contributed to it. I've been mindful to be reassuring about the changes, she has a lovely bedroom etc. she doesn't seem to care and lets any reprimand go over her head

Customer:

thanks for that link btw

earthsister :

Yes, I agree that changes like that can as well cause these kinds of responses in children. I first recommend, that if you haven't already. you speak to her pediatrician about the soiling, so that you can assure that you are covering all basis.

earthsister :

Try not to punish your daughter, because this may make her feel bad about herself; especially if it is a problem that she can't control (or needs to learn to control).

earthsister :

Talk to your daughter as well. Ask her if there is any reason that she does not use the potty. She may not tell you anything that makes sense, or she may just give you the answer that you were looking for.

Customer:

is there anything i can do differently?

earthsister :

It could be as simple as the kind of toilet seat you have; or maybe in some way she has become afraid of the toilet, or the water. Either way, talking to your daughter and asking, and most importantly taking it to her pediatrician would be the best ways to find out why she is doing it; and thus answer exactly what you need to do to solve the problem

earthsister :

Knowing that she was doing it fine before tells you a lot; so whatever you did to get her to use the potty before worked

earthsister :

So now, you must figure out exactly what has made her stop

earthsister, Parent
Category: Parenting
Satisfied Customers: 141
Experience: Home Child Care Provider, and mother of 4; two pre-teen boys and twin baby girls.
earthsister and other Parenting Specialists are ready to help you
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
there has been a problem with payment, this isn't because of insufficient funds. its probably because i don't make many internet transactions. i have asked for mailing address details so i can mail payment, i don't have another card to use. very sorry about this, totally unintended
Expert:  earthsister replied 2 years ago.
Good morning. That is ok, I appreciate your honesty. JustAnswer however has made sure that I have been paid, perhaps now you just have to add money to your account to make up for that payment, I am not sure, however, if you contact customer service: Customer Support team at (888) 587-822, and tell them of the situation, they will be better able to tell you what to do next. I thank you again for consulting JustAnswer. Let me know if there is any other way that I can assist you.

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