Good evening/early morning, I will do my best to assist you.
Decisions that involve another parent and custody/visitation can be rough, I can relate. My honest opinion is that every child needs a father in his or her life; as long as his presence is not harming the child, a child needs to know and have interaction with both parents in order to have the best opportunity at understanding themselves as they grow into adulthood.
but he flakes 24/7
that is emotional harm
How has your daughter been holding up without seeing him these past four weeks?
she has been donig okay
asks for him here and there
but i told her
he went on a trip
for a while
so she at least thinks
he is away for good reason
no phone calls or anything from him?
he stopped by twice
two saturdays ina row
but did weird stuff
ok, that's a start. Did he see her?
like dropped off a dollhoues
with my friend who answered the door
also a note in crayon in the mailbox
was it a new doll house? a gift?
saying daddy loves you
and some health insurance cars
awe. he loves her!
but he has deep anger management issues
and a huge ego
he hates me
and is letting her suffer
just because i am holding him to a scheudle
I definitely would say, give him time. Talk to him
he cut me off
when we split
does not talk to me
only mean texts and emails
i have had friends reach out as well
Men hate to be told when they can and cannot see their child
saying hey - can you set a time to see her
and he won't respond to them
well kids hate when their dad's flake
and it is damaging
that is true
trust me, I have been though a similar scenario
Give him time. Don't restrict his ability to see his daughter. He obviously loves her very much. Talk to him, calm and honestly if you can. Let him know that it's not about him nor you, but about your daughter; and that she needs him in her life
It is worse for a child to not be with their parent; if it takes bowing to him, so that the court order is not followed; if that what it takes to get him back with his daughter, so be it. Again, it is not about you, nor him, but about your daughter.
i have tried
he doesn't talk to me
he hangs up
i have almost lost my job
because of the frequency with which he flakes
doesn't follow the schedule
my child's heart has been broken on countless occassions
Is this the court ordered schedule that you are saying he isn't following?
there is a court ordered schedule
but since then i asked for a shchedule that works for him.
so is he not following that schedule?
maybe the problem is strictly with the courts.
maybe he doesn't want them involved at all.
it doesn't matter what he wants.
tanks for trying to help
i am loggin off now.
I am sorry that I was unable to help with a solution this time. My final suggestion is to do what it takes to make sure that your daughter has a relationship with her father. If it means losing the court order, so that he feels confident in his own position as a man, and as a father to make decisions involving his child; including when he will see her, that is what I recommend. It seems that he obviously loves his little girl very much. It's always unfortunate when a break up between a man and a woman leaves a child stranded in the middle; again I can relate. I wish you all the best. If there is any way that I can be of further assistance. Please let me know.