Hi. Welcome. I am a Licensed Master Social Worker with more than 20 years experience working with individuals and families. I am also a mom of Twins.
There is no real set time, it is truly up to you and your family norms around this....
I can say that kids do much better with a routine and keeping to the same schedule day after day and night after night even if there is no school.
a few minutes here or there isn;t crucial.
what time are they going in now?
around ten o'clock, and I think that is too late
yes way too late...for sure...how are their moods during the day?
they are okay. It is just that they fall asleep on the sofa around 10 PM, and then my husband carries them to bed. By then I am long asleep (have to get up early). We argue a lot about this, and I realized that I really didn't know what a good bed time is.
I think for them it should be in bed by 8....bath time before...stories in bed and leave the room by 8:15
It wont be met without protest, but this routine is a healthy one for them and for you.
plus they should be falling asleep in their beds and not the couch
and the two of you need to be on the same page for sure as they will pick up on it and use it to their advantage when you begin to make the switch.
if you decide to make this switch then talk with them about it before hand and make it fun...
mommy and daddy are going to do some new and fun things before bedtime with you.
we will have dinner, then take a cozy bath, get you in your pjs and get you into your beds. We will read some books and then hug and kiss goodnight.
Mommy and Daddy are tired at night and we need that time too to sleep in our bed alone.
remember you are not asking their position only letting them know in advance what the change will be
you will also see an improvemtn in your relationship with your husband if you stick to this EVERY night.
are you still with me?
let me know if i can still help you