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professional_Alison, Child Care
Category: Parenting
Satisfied Customers: 78
Experience:  Degree in early years,16 years experience in childcare
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Hi, I want to ask about my 24 year old daughter again. I think

Resolved Question:

Hi, I want to ask about my 24 year old daughter again. I think I need advice on how to help her become more independent. Today I got this email from her:

"I feel really terrible asking but is there anyway you could help me out with a little money? I miscalculated my check book and kind of screwed myself. Like $100-$150? I promise I’m working really hard to get this whole money thing figured out so I can get caught up. "

She does this often. I have the money but I want her to be more responsible. I am afraid I have enabled this. I think her father helps her a lot too.

She is a type 1 diabetic and we help her with the co-pay for diabetes supplies since she doesn't make enough money to pay for them. We are happy to help with that but I think she is not managing her money well otherwise. She has a good job with benefits and makes enough to live on if she is not extravagant. I need to know how to begin to pull away from her financially. Sometimes I worry that I am too late. Ideas?
Submitted: 4 years ago.
Category: Parenting
Expert:  professional_Alison replied 4 years ago.

professional_Alison :

Hello there, may I help you? You are in a difficult situation here, not wanting to see your daughter struggling but also wanting her to be independant and learn to manage her own money.

professional_Alison :

She does need to learn to stand on here own two feet and you are doing the right thing by not giving in to her.

professional_Alison :

If she has over stretched herself she will perhaps have to consider getting a saturday job to cover her expenses. Offer to help her with budgeting as her Dad has done but that has to be all.

professional_Alison :

Here is an article I found which may be of interest to you.

professional_Alison :

If you continue to keep helping her she is never going to learn to cope without you bailing her out when things get difficult.

professional_Alison :

Funding her medicine is fine but that has to be all. She will thank you in the long run, even though it's very hard.

professional_Alison :

Just continue to guide and support, provide advise and help without financial support.

professional_Alison :

She is an adult and has to learn that life is not always easy.

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