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professional_Alison
professional_Alison, Child Care
Category: Parenting
Satisfied Customers: 78
Experience:  Degree in early years,16 years experience in childcare
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Problem with my ex girlfriend and my 2 children.

Resolved Question:

Problem with my ex girlfriend and my 2 children.
Submitted: 2 years ago.
Category: Parenting
Expert:  professional_Alison replied 2 years ago.

professional_Alison : Hello there, may I help you? Can you explain what the problems are and I will do my best to advise you.
Customer:

Hi how are wow that tough for some reason lol

Customer:

I am Bill by the way

Customer:

Hello?\

Customer:

Hello?

Customer:

Hi

Customer:

are you there Alison

professional_Alison : Yes I am can I help you
Customer:

My name is XXXXX XXXXX to meet you.

professional_Alison : Please explain the problems you are experiencing?
Customer:

Well, here is the story..... I have 2 children with full custody of both of them. I am single Father. My son just turned 16 I adopted him and raised him since he was 0. I have my daughter who is 11 years old now. They are both from the same women. The children live with me.

Customer:

I was with her for around 8 years

Customer:

She was very verbally abusive to my son (adopted) and sometimes physically.

Customer:

When my daughter was born

Customer:

I decided to give this woman a chance to change

Customer:

I thought mabye a gorgeous sweet baby girl would change her thought process

Customer:

I got her into some counseling

Customer:

etc

Customer:

Nothing worked

Customer:

She blamed it on her thyroid lol

Customer:

She cheated on me before my daughter was born and left us once.

Customer:

Even though I had 0 rights to him

Customer:

We moved to Las Vegas so I could adopt him

Customer:

on the way here she got pregnant with my girl.

Customer:

after the abuse just continued... I decided that could not let my daughter grow up the way my son had

Customer:

I paid her 3000 dollars and bought her a plane ticket back to ohio.

Customer:

I felt terrible

Customer:

So I dated another Woman from Las Vegas for a while that just stupid. So I've tried and tried to reach out to the mother

Customer:

and reconnect the relationship

Customer:

This girl hasn't seen my daughter or son in about 9 years

Customer:

She tries to call once in a while but

Customer:

I will not allow her to speak to them because of the mental problems I think it will cause my children

Customer:

is this making sense lol

Customer:

I guess not

Customer:

ok this slow slow

professional_Alison : You sound you have given there mother every opportunity to change. There comes a time when if this lady Causing more harm than good to the children then they are better of not spending time with her. They can still keep contact going if they wish to. At 16 your son will be old enough to make that decision. But as you say she hasn't t been a part of your daughter life so she is not missing out. You sound like a very caring father who is doing a great job with his children.
Customer:

Thanks

Customer:

Something is telling me to bring her back

Customer:

and I try

Customer:

My son doesn't care

Customer:

he loves his Dad

Customer:

I am trying to heal old wounds

professional_Alison : I think you need to continue as you are putting your childrens best interests first and she your daughter is older if she decides she wants to see her mother you can support her in making an informed decision.
professional_Alison : I think if you try and bring g her back you may cause more harm than good.
Customer:

yes she is on my facebook

Customer:

I should block all communications and just live it and move on.

Customer:

BUT

Customer:

here is the problem

Customer:

I am thinking about moving back to Ohio to be near my friends so my children have more family oriented enviorment

Customer:

kids playing outside etc

Customer:

this woman never has paid child support anything like that

Customer:

I am afraid to go back to my hometown because of that reason.

professional_Alison : I think you need to distance yourself from her and accept you are all fine without contact. Even if you move back does not mean she has to have any involvement.
Customer:

Ya she wouldn't know anyway where they are.

Customer:

I don't want to have to be a major jerk and file restraining orders press charges etc

Customer:

she tells me I have to tell her which I know is a bunch of garbage

Customer:

I feel in my heart though

professional_Alison : You need to move forward without this lady in any of your lives. Be strLNG and make informed choices with her influencing your decisions.
Customer:

that I should do something but everyone says wha you say.

Customer:

ok

Customer:

i have to just bite the bullet and really stick to my guns no matter what my personal emotions are.

Customer:

it's the best thing for them most likely ya

professional_Alison : You are best protecting your children and making the decisions here. Cut ties and move forward together just the three of you.
professional_Alison : Please accept if I have helped you. I must go now but message me if I can help you further.
Customer:

ok cool Alison I am going to block her on facebook block my numbers and just toughen that soft spot up of mine. They're plenty of nice women

Customer:

You have it's really common sense and hearing it from another woman helps me tremedously

Customer:

thank you

professional_Alison : I admire your strength. Good luck.
Customer:

I am tought! :)

Customer:

i can handle it I just feel bad

Customer:

it doesn't make sense how people can be so cold

Customer:

thanks again. I honestly think she has a sociopathic disorder of some kind.

Customer:

ok

Customer:

Have fun and make some money! :)

Customer:

I do internet work as well

Customer:

:)

Customer:

I think there is a problem with the site

Customer:

I hit accept

Customer:

and it brought me back

Customer:

Nite

professional_Alison : Many thanks
professional_Alison : It doesn't seem to have accepted.
professional_Alison, Child Care
Category: Parenting
Satisfied Customers: 78
Experience: Degree in early years,16 years experience in childcare
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professional_Alison
professional_Alison
Parenting Counselor
78 Satisfied Customers
Degree in early years,16 years experience in childcare