We won Temporary custody in OK using the brusing. It was based on abandonment and endangerment. But, the TEXAS Judge didn't like that we took it out of his jurisdiction and took it back to Texas. We live in OK and we were told to go to court in our home state as that was now her home state...well...not according to Texas. If you divorce in Texas they can bring you back from Alaska!! But, based on that history, I am concerned about her safety. I need profession assistance in helping HER now that the Judge decided the father, before any testimony, could have her every other week for a week. She tells us how her daddy doesn't like us or basically anyone that helped her raise her, literally. He is very prejudice and I put her in a bilingual sitter home to assist her in the future...he hates this...but can't change it right now legally...she told us as I stated earlier that he "spanks" her and one of the times I asked her why..she said "because I cry for you grandma" and like I said I asked her, for some reason, "where" and she said "my hands". I was aware he was spanking her bottom..which she doesn't need..he doesn't believe in "time outs" ( I have had to use two the entire time we've raised her and she is a live wire)..my problem is, can a baby that just turned 3 "play" each of us against the other? Literally? I need to know how to let her know everything is ok when he does that. I told her every night that I've had her since she was born that "mommy and daddy love" her because I was afraid this would happen and I wanted her to have a little bit of a base. To protect her and maybe make life easier. Now when I comfort her and just say "daddy was in a bad mood" ,etc...my husband is worried that I may be indicating to her that I am allowing this because I try to hold my tongue ( I have half of it left) because I don't want her life miserable and I sure don't want her to say something to him that would make him mad and him smack her again...CPS will NOT get involved with just spanking. My question is, how do I protect her mentally and why is she distancing from me and seem happier to go to others? I know this is selfish, but I've been the caregiver from the get go. They would call me and put her on the phone when she was crying because even at day's old, I could calm her verbally..I'm lost.
My internet keeps disconnecting. Did you get my last reply??? Thank you so much for your extra time.
When your granddaughter tells you that her father has spanked her do not comment on his behavior. Ask her to tell you more about it and get as many details as possible. You can say “I’m so sorry to hear about this. That must have really hurt you. You are a good girl, I don’t know why your father would spank you.”
She is not playing you against each other. That is correct.
I suggest you replace your attorney. He doesn’t seem to care about your granddaughter’s welfare.
It’s unlikely that you can reverse the brain-washing because the girl’s father is a much bigger influence on her than you can be at this time. Don’t worry about adding to the damage. You are not going to do that.
The solution to this problem is that you must remain vigilant. Eventually, there is a good chance you will find bruises on the girl. When you do you can call CPS and an investigation will be initiated.
Before I "accept", I wanted to thank you for your extra time and I am so sorry to have disrupt your initial reply. I'm just lost. I wish we could afford to replace this attorney. He doesn't get "personally involved" in his cases, but we are out of close to 12,000 and to start over we can't do financially...we don't know what to do...
I know it's not your concern...but thank you so much for ALL your listening to me!!!
I don't even want to know how the cases like this usually turn out...I don't think it will be in her favor. She's such a good little girl. I just don't know. But I will not acknowledge his behavior. Details are hard to get because this usually talkative little girl will hardly acknowledge us when we DO question her. Complete turn around. Yet she acts like she likes to go with him and looks forward to it. I've been a nurse 18 years and am 50 years old and I NEVER would have thought I would have something like this happen. EVER. Again, thank you so much.