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Ask Coach Jen K. Your Own Question

Coach Jen K.
Coach Jen K., LMSW, CPC
Category: Parenting
Satisfied Customers: 1722
Experience:  Licensed Master Social Worker. Certified Coach Mom of Twins.
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My son is 7 months old. He used to sleep through the night,

Resolved Question:

My son is 7 months old. He used to sleep through the night, but the last few weeks has gone back to waking up every few hrs. HELP! Not sure what to do to get him back to sleeping through the night.
Submitted: 2 years ago.
Category: Parenting
Expert:  Coach Jen K. replied 2 years ago.

CoachJenK :

Hi Good morning.

CoachJenK :

Many things can interrupt the wonderful pattern of a young baby. My hunch is that he is teething which often disrupts the sleep cycle.

CoachJenK :

what things are oyu doing to get him back to sleep?

Customer:

The easiest, nursing.

Customer:

lol

CoachJenK :

ahhhhhhh

CoachJenK :

well helllooooo

CoachJenK :

there is a reward right there

Customer:

Sometimes we just let him cry it out & let him go back to sleep on his own.

CoachJenK :

if you gave me a chocolate chip cookie each time I woke up, my guess is I would wake up so I can have a cookie

Customer:

lol

CoachJenK :

nothing better than the warm comfort of mommy

Customer:

Well I definitely hate that routine cause I want sleep! lol. Should we keep just letting him cry it out? Or do you have any other suggestions?

CoachJenK :

and trust be i know that it is so tiring and the nursing helps all involved but the goal is to let him do it on his own with some hlp

CoachJenK :

of course I do...

Customer:

I was swaddling him, which helped at first. But now he's wanting to sleep on his side & wiggle. So even if I swaddle him he wiggles out of it.

CoachJenK :

when you say cry it out, let me know on greater detail how you are doing that

Customer:

Shove my head under a pillow & pretend its not happening. lol.

CoachJenK :

You are so funny!

Customer:

He isn't screaming or anything, it's more laying there talking & wining.

CoachJenK :

yes because he knows that if he does that the warm milk is on its way

Customer:

This morning, it started at 3 am & lasted till about 4:15....

CoachJenK :

ok so when he whines and moans and you leave him does he fall back?

Customer:

Eventually. It just seems like he takes forever.

Customer:

And then in the morning is super raunchy because he didn't sleep.

CoachJenK :

yes and it does because you are lying there hoping and praying he gets quiet

CoachJenK :

the good thing is that he has shown you that he can get back to sleep

CoachJenK :

I think he may be waking during teething and then got the reinforcement from you

Customer:

Not going to deny it. lol.

CoachJenK :

so how do you think he would do if you went to him for 5 seconds....dont pick him up but pat, not rub his back and repeat the mantra mommy is here. its time to sleep

Customer:

He freaks!

CoachJenK :

because he thinks nursing is coming?!

Customer:

I've done that. Went over, told him it's ok, offered the binky, etc. And when I walk away he screams bloody murder.

CoachJenK :

given that, I would have to say that letting him be there and fall back on his own as you have been doing is the way to go...the time it takes will get shorter after some hellish nights for you and him for sure

CoachJenK :

are you putting anything on his gums before bed?

CoachJenK :

is he showing signs of teethin/

CoachJenK :

sorry for my typos

Customer:

I've tried giving him a lil motrin, but he doesn't like anything else. Orajel doesn't seem to have any affect either.

CoachJenK :

brain works much faster

Customer:

I know the feeling. lol.

Customer:

He just got his first tooth a few weeks ago.

CoachJenK :

there are some holistic tablets that go under the tongue

Customer:

I suspect he has another coming, but I don't feel the bump yet

CoachJenK :

well mommy you have hit it on the head...first tooth a few weeks ago, less sleeping a few weeks ago

CoachJenK :

yeah and you might not the pain for him is always before it breaks.

Customer:

I used teething tablets for my daughter when she was teething. But I can't find them in stores around here.

CoachJenK :

once we think our baby is in a good pattern...boom something throws it off.

Customer:

Luckily with my daughter she didn't get her first tooth till she was 16 months. Popcicles were her miracle workers. LOL

CoachJenK :

can you deal with some hellish nights for a bit...no nursing and letting him know its not fun to wak up in the night because nothing good happens.

CoachJenK :

right now he knows the chocolate chip cookie is coming so he is whining for it

Customer:

I'm sure I could find some online, but haven't looked.

Customer:

lol

CoachJenK :

that could help at least a little

Customer:

Yeah. I have done that before. His daddy hates doing it. Feels awful.

Customer:

lol

CoachJenK :

does he freak if you husband goes to him to pat his back?

Customer:

But he's not the one that is nursing either.

Customer:

Hmm... Haven't tried that.

CoachJenK :

exactly!

Customer:

We'll give that a shot tonight. :D

Customer:

Might work if daddy lets him know it's ok.

CoachJenK :

here is why I say that. If his attachment is strong with you which is great and he knows daddy is coming in with a calm flat tone of reassurance then maybe he settles

CoachJenK :

it may take a few trips down the hall for several hours and a few nights so Daddy will be tired, but it could work

Customer:

Definitely worth a shot. :)

CoachJenK :

it will get abit worse before it gets better because your son will be making an adjustment and he will protest for sure

Customer:

Yeah.

CoachJenK :

dont devaite from the plan, the tone, picking him up, etc

CoachJenK :

daddy may not like it...sorry dad

CoachJenK :

does he have your scent in his crib in anyway?

Customer:

As long as mommy gets sleep... lol

CoachJenK :

EXACTLY!

CoachJenK :

now you are catching on

CoachJenK :

mommy deserves it

CoachJenK :

does he sleep with anything in the crib yet?

Customer:

lol

Customer:

I have a music thingy on the side that has a waterfall.

Customer:

Not sure exactly what it's called.

Customer:

But it plays music & cricket sounds and stuff.

CoachJenK :

its called a thingy :-)

CoachJenK :

when is he allowed to have a little lovey? I forget my twins are 3.

CoachJenK :

ask your pediatrician when they say it is okay for the lovey and then get him a small little square blanket and you sleep with it for a few days and then place it with him assuming your doc says its ok. Get tow of them so one can always be in your bed with your scent and then you can alternate if need be

Customer:

lol. I'm not sure. I let my daughter start having a stuffed animal about 1 yr. And it was for music.

Customer:

Cool.

Customer:

I'll try that.

Customer:

We have an appt today, so I'll ask.

CoachJenK :

maybe send an email or call to see when they recommend it. Because if you get through these next few nights and let him fall back on his own and then soon you can use a lovey with your smell on it life will be good

Customer:

I'm sure my scent would help comfort him when he wakes up.

CoachJenK :

perfect timing!

CoachJenK :

yes it would.

CoachJenK :

but dont do it until your Doc says it is okay.

CoachJenK :

Because we never want anything to end up over his face.

CoachJenK :

as you know having an older child

Customer:

yeah

CoachJenK :

how old is your daughter?

Customer:

3 yr old

CoachJenK :

you are EXHAUSTED!

Customer:

Big time. lol.

Customer:

My work shift also starts at 5:50 am, so I get very little sleep even when they sleep through the night. So it really hurts with him not.

CoachJenK :

well he has shown you he can go back on his own without screaming...that is huge, so we just need a few tough nights and the time of his staying awake should decrease as along as there is consistency and not giving in the the tempation

CoachJenK :

oh my...that is unbelievable. Kudos to you.

Customer:

lol, I owe it all to coffee. ;)

CoachJenK :

even more push to have you get this on the right track asap

Customer:

lol

CoachJenK :

whatever works, right?

Customer:

Yeah. Honestly I wouldn't mind so much if I didn't need the sleep so badly.

CoachJenK :

nah you would mind...it hurts no matter what

Customer:

But when this routine started, i noticed milk production decreasing because of lack of sleep.

CoachJenK :

more motivation!

CoachJenK :

ok so tell me the plan....

Customer:

Bury my head & let him settle himself back to sleep. We'll try seeing if dad can comfort him to settle. Teething tablets, and ask about the lovey at the dr's today.

CoachJenK :

see you are not too tired if you remembered all of that... :-) what are you complaining about? LOL

Customer:

LOL

Customer:

Coffee ;)

CoachJenK :

if you think dad even needs to go in...you can always just have a few nights of nithing and try that and see if that works

CoachJenK :

I might say try that first since you havve been doing it

CoachJenK :

put a pillow over dad's ears if he feels bad

Customer:

lol

Customer:

He's a softy.

CoachJenK :

a few nights of him going down the hall he wont feel so bad

Customer:

Very true.

CoachJenK :

but try nothing first because you have said that he can do it, it just takes a long time.

CoachJenK :

so try to wait that out before we send softy in

Customer:

LOL

Customer:

Can I ask you one other question about my son while I have you? It should be fairly quick.

CoachJenK :

of course!!!!

Customer:

:D yay!

Customer:

So we introduced solids a few weeks ago (I know, timing lol). And since doing so, he's loosing interest in nursing (besides during the night). Sadly I can't get him to drink hardly anything. :(

Customer:

I'm wondering if that means now is a good time to think about weaning him... And if I did, would I need to start up formula.

CoachJenK :

yes and so now when you give it to him at night he is like ahhh thank god Ive been waiting for this rather than those yucky bananas.

CoachJenK :

He is doing the weaning naturally and showing you he might be ready. Talk to Doc about that one today.

Customer:

K. That's part of the plan.

CoachJenK :

you have it all together Mommy!

CoachJenK :

You are doing great...a little tired but totally on the ball

Customer:

I'm sad he is loosing interest in me. :( I nursed my daughter till she was 14 months. But she also didn't have teeth. lol.

CoachJenK :

yes and that is probably more of what it is about why you are willing to do this at night too.

CoachJenK :

sad when those emotions come up for sure

Customer:

I admit it. I'm guilty. Let's face it, it's nice being able to offer something no one else can.

CoachJenK :

absolutely you are a loving mom

Customer:

And here I heard boys were a lot harder to wean. lol

CoachJenK :

he will still be your little love always no matter what

Customer:

:) Thank you so much for the help. I really appreciate your input.

Customer:

It's nice hearing I'm on the right track.

CoachJenK :

It has been my pleasure. You truly are doing great and I appreciate your feedback too.

CoachJenK :

Keep that loving heart.

Customer:

:)

Coach Jen K., LMSW, CPC
Category: Parenting
Satisfied Customers: 1722
Experience: Licensed Master Social Worker. Certified Coach Mom of Twins.
Coach Jen K. and other Parenting Specialists are ready to help you

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