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proexpert37
proexpert37, Educator/Life Coach
Category: Parenting
Satisfied Customers: 1374
Experience:  Teacher 20+ years, Parent, Expert Mentor
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I have two sons who are now living with their mother but will

Customer Question

I have two sons who are now living with their mother but will be living with me starting June 1st for at least a year for the younger son and the older son will be with me permanently. No problems with the younger son who makes straight A's an a great personality. My older son, age 16 is "lazy". He is capable of making straight A's and has in the past but does not bring homework home to where he lives now which is with his mother.
Both sons play games on computer to excess. The older son gives me no problems but just does not follow through on some things such as getting set up for a college class this summer. The older son has expressed a desire to live with me per custody situation.
I know I should cut down on his computer usage but what in its place? Maybe force him to bring here his Friday homework as he is now here all weekend until
Sunday night? He does not even want an allowance but I do give him money for various things at times.
Submitted: 2 years ago.
Category: Parenting
Expert:  proexpert37 replied 2 years ago.
Hello and Thank You for consulting Just Answer. Is your older son just all around lazy about everything: school, chores, keeping room cleaned, etc. and only interested in video games? Has he always been that way?
Customer: replied 2 years ago.

He says he does his school work and completes it at school but I know sometimes he forgets to do certain school things. He will do any chore I ask him to do. However if I assign a general chore such as keeping waste baskets empty--he just forgets.

He got 2 A's 2B's and 2C's on his last report card which is poor for him. He has his own room and a lock and I let him lock it a lot. He does not like staying with his mother and says he sleeps a lot there. I know I can cut down on his computer games but need a replacement. He has been this way to some degree but now it is worse. I know I am not much of a person to lay down the law. Was thinking of giving him specific chores and specific tasks such as bringing his school work when he starts his

Friday thru Sunday visits or I can cut off his computer or at least lower the amount of computer usage. I am not great in discipline.

Expert:  proexpert37 replied 2 years ago.
Since he likes using the computer so much, use that as a reward and take it away if he does not complete chores. Make a list of chores that he needs to complete daily. If he fails to complete anything, take the computer away for three days. If he has to use it for homework, you must monitor his usage. If he can successfully complete the chores during the three days, give him the computer back. That is about the only thing that you can use to make him get off his butt. However just to let you know, many teen age boys just eat, sleep, play video games, and text friends. Maybe see if he will get involved in sports or get a part time job to keep him away from the computer.
proexpert37, Educator/Life Coach
Category: Parenting
Satisfied Customers: 1374
Experience: Teacher 20+ years, Parent, Expert Mentor
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