How JustAnswer Works:

  • Ask an Expert
    Experts are full of valuable knowledge and are ready to help with any question. Credentials confirmed by a Fortune 500 verification firm.
  • Get a Professional Answer
    Via email, text message, or notification as you wait on our site.
    Ask follow up questions if you need to.
  • 100% Satisfaction Guarantee
    Rate the answer you receive.

Ask proexpert37 Your Own Question

proexpert37
proexpert37, Educator/Life Coach
Category: Parenting
Satisfied Customers: 1374
Experience:  Teacher 20+ years, Parent, Expert Mentor
Type Your Parenting Question Here...
proexpert37 is online now
A new question is answered every 9 seconds

I need tips on how to talk to my son and activities I can do

Resolved Question:

I need tips on how to talk to my son and activities I can do with him
Submitted: 2 years ago.
Category: Parenting
Expert:  Coach Jen K. replied 2 years ago.
-Could you explain your situation a little more?
How old is your son? what types of issues are you having with him that you are having difficulty communicating? Please provide more detail so I can support you.
Customer: replied 2 years ago.

Oh, I am sorry. I was talking to somebody else before and and I thought it was the same person.

My son is 14 in 9th grade. He doesn't like school and he is skipping classes or going late. He wants to be with his friends all the time and he is very easy to follow bad directions.

Expert:  Coach Jen K. replied 2 years ago.
If you would like to get back to that other expert...I will try and help. Can you look to see who it was so I can get you back there?
Expert:  Coach Jen K. replied 2 years ago.
You were working with Jordan1314.
re list your question and put for Jordan1314 at the beginning of your question.
Expert:  proexpert37 replied 2 years ago.
Hello and Thank You for requesting me. What are the issues that you need to discuss with you son? Do you want your son to hang around a better choice of friends? Are you a single parent? What does your son do in his free time? Does he like sports or video games? What does the school do about skipping classes? Is your son receiving any counseling? By any chance, do you attend church? Thanks!
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
he likes football and basketball but he only wants to play with his friends. School does in school suspention or community services but he does and no complains. sometimes I go to church but his dad goes every saturday so he will be going with him. I am a single parent but his dad helps. No he is not receiving counseling. his school is supposed to be testing him to see what kind of help he needs.
Expert:  proexpert37 replied 2 years ago.
Hello...thank you for responding. I will have an answer for you shortly as I am still pondering your issues. :)
Expert:  proexpert37 replied 2 years ago.
Will have your answer very soon.

:)
Expert:  proexpert37 replied 2 years ago.
Hello my friend. Parenting is a learning experience. Parents will not
always be perfect. You must use trial and error to discover which
techniques work best with your teen. You have the right to use
authority, set rules and limits, and decide what behavior is acceptable
or not. Unfortunately, no parent has the ability to truly control
their teen. So control is not the goal. A parent's aim is to
influence their teens and teach them self control. Teens are people
too and deserve to be treated with respect even though their behavior
may be undesirable.

Your son is at a stage in his life in which he thinks his way is the
right way no matter what you will say. He is only trying to assert his
independence and wants to feel in control of everything. You appear to
be a very concerned and caring mother. I applaud you for that,
especially as a single mother dealing with such issues. I understand
that you would like better ways to communicate with your son. Pick a
time of day that you are both free from distractions and do not have to
rush off anywhere. Express your concerns in an honest and truthful
way. Speak in a respectful manner. Then allow your son to express
his concerns. If possible , his dad can be present as well. Tell
your son that he needs to take more responsibility for his actions and
be held accountable for his undesirable behavior. Create a
contract/list of the rules he must follow. Then with your son's input,
create acceptable rewards and consequences that you all agree upon.
Your son will feel like he is still in control but that is perfectly
fine. You have discussed rules, rewards , and consequences with him.
He needs to know what you expect.
Hopefully your son will be receptive and open and want to discuss such
important issues. If he just brushes you and his dad off and is
withdrawn from communicating, then you must employ the services of an
outside professional to break through to your son.

I have a feeling that the biggest problem is the friends that your son
hangs around with. You cannot select the friends for your son. You
can encourage him to make better choices. He may do better if he had a
change of schools or possibly live with his dad.

Nonetheless, see if you can have THE TALK with your son as I mentioned
above. If that does not go well, let me know. We will go from there.

Have a blessed day.
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
Thank you for your tips. they are really helpful and I will put them in place and hopufully I will see some results.
Expert:  proexpert37 replied 2 years ago.
You are most welcome. Have a great day! Feel free to request me, Jordan1314, anytime.
proexpert37, Educator/Life Coach
Category: Parenting
Satisfied Customers: 1374
Experience: Teacher 20+ years, Parent, Expert Mentor
proexpert37 and 2 other Parenting Specialists are ready to help you

JustAnswer in the News:

 
 
 
Ask-a-doc Web sites: If you've got a quick question, you can try to get an answer from sites that say they have various specialists on hand to give quick answers... Justanswer.com.
JustAnswer.com...has seen a spike since October in legal questions from readers about layoffs, unemployment and severance.
Web sites like justanswer.com/legal
...leave nothing to chance.
Traffic on JustAnswer rose 14 percent...and had nearly 400,000 page views in 30 days...inquiries related to stress, high blood pressure, drinking and heart pain jumped 33 percent.
Tory Johnson, GMA Workplace Contributor, discusses work-from-home jobs, such as JustAnswer in which verified Experts answer people’s questions.
I will tell you that...the things you have to go through to be an Expert are quite rigorous.
 
 
 

What Customers are Saying:

 
 
 
  • Wonderful service, prompt, efficient, and accurate. Couldn't have asked for more. I cannot thank you enough for your help. Mary C. Freshfield, Liverpool, UK
< Last | Next >
  • Wonderful service, prompt, efficient, and accurate. Couldn't have asked for more. I cannot thank you enough for your help. Mary C. Freshfield, Liverpool, UK
  • This expert is wonderful. They truly know what they are talking about, and they actually care about you. They really helped put my nerves at ease. Thank you so much!!!! Alex Los Angeles, CA
  • Thank you for all your help. It is nice to know that this service is here for people like myself, who need answers fast and are not sure who to consult. GP Hesperia, CA
  • I couldn't be more satisfied! This is the site I will always come to when I need a second opinion. Justin Kernersville, NC
  • Just let me say that this encounter has been entirely professional and most helpful. I liked that I could ask additional questions and get answered in a very short turn around. Esther Woodstock, NY
  • Thank you so much for taking your time and knowledge to support my concerns. Not only did you answer my questions, you even took it a step further with replying with more pertinent information I needed to know. Robin Elkton, Maryland
  • He answered my question promptly and gave me accurate, detailed information. If all of your experts are half as good, you have a great thing going here. Diane Dallas, TX
 
 
 

Meet The Experts:

 
 
 
  • Rafael M.T.Therapist

    Family Counselor

    Satisfied Customers:

    108
    MHT-MHRS-MS-MA Integral Psychotherapist & Life Coach
< Last | Next >
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/IN/intrapsyc.com/2012-2-20_161928_RGMTPicturex5002012.64x64.png Rafael M.T.Therapist's Avatar

    Rafael M.T.Therapist

    Family Counselor

    Satisfied Customers:

    108
    MHT-MHRS-MS-MA Integral Psychotherapist & Life Coach
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/jhollo77/2010-2-6_651_Avatar.jpg Jennifer's Avatar

    Jennifer

    School Psychologist

    Satisfied Customers:

    77
    Collaborative parent consultation on everything from modifying behavior to child development.
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/VO/vodkas25/2012-1-29_16528_P1010831.64x64.JPG professional_Alison's Avatar

    professional_Alison

    Child Care

    Satisfied Customers:

    77
    Degree in early years,16 years experience in childcare
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/HU/hungryjack20/IMG_1281_edit_2.64x64.jpg Dr. L's Avatar

    Dr. L

    Psychologist

    Satisfied Customers:

    40
    Licensed as psychologist and marriage and family therapist
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/KA/KaterB1270/2012-5-2_17226_016.64x64.jpg KaterB1270's Avatar

    KaterB1270

    Teacher

    Satisfied Customers:

    18
    BS Family Consumer Sciences Ed. and Masters of Art in Teaching
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/KA/Kansastherapist/2012-6-13_171911_4upon20120220at14.64x64.jpg KansasTherapist's Avatar

    KansasTherapist

    LSCSW

    Satisfied Customers:

    17
    17 years experience with depression, abuse, and borderline.
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/JA/JACUSTOMERbryjz898/2012-5-23_93829_me2.64x64.jpg Adviser Mills C.C.D.'s Avatar

    Adviser Mills C.C.D.

    Child Care

    Satisfied Customers:

    15
    15 years Plus, Preschool Owner, Teen Mentor