Hi, thank you for contacting Just Answer. My name is Ja`Ree and I am a mental health counselor. It sounds as though you are at the need of your rope here. I would like to help you find a solution to this relationship/parenting problem. In order to do that I would like to get a little more information from you about you. First of all, has he always been this verbally abusive with you, even as a child? Secondly, do you know why you allow him to show you such disrespect in public and in your own home? It will help me better assist you if you could answer these questions for me. I will be waiting for your reply. Thank you, Ja`Ree
My son was bougfht up to be polite and respectful and at other times maintains that he loves me very dearly. My husband left when he was three and there has always been the two of us. He has always been a strong personality but since being made the partner at the firm he has become an abusive bully. He only does this to me and to a much lesser degree to another lady of about the same age. I would like adv ice as to how to stop him doing this - I know I should not allow it but how do I disallow it??
Would you consider finding someone you can talk to on a regular basis that can help you deal with the feelings that come with this situation and assist you with developing the skills you need to set boundaries, be assertive and practice self care while still showing respect for your son. The kind of relationship you have with your son is not an easy one to change, however, it can be changed and needs to be. It is not healthy for you or your son and I would like to see you get some assistance to make the relationship a healthy one and to enable you to receive the respect for yourself and from others that you deserve. Is this something you would consider?
I would do this but I work 7am- 7pm and care for my brother until 9am - it would be so hard to find someone who could help in between. I know I am allowing myself to be abused and I just don't know how to react to stop it. I just bow my head and feel ashamed when all my staff hear this,
I wish you would make it a priority to find the time to take care of you, or you are not going to be able to give the kind of care you need to give to your brother. I wish you knew that you are just as important as everyone you help. Would you like me to make some suggestions for possible books you can read and work through on your own?
I would really like that thank you
Codependent-No-More-by-Melody-Beattie is a good book and so is
Please let me know if I can assist you further in this. If this answer has helped you then please press the Accept button at the bottom of the page so that I can be paid by Just Answer. Also, please fill out the feedback form so that I can know how to better serve our customers. Again, thank you for contacting Just Answer.