Hi, Please give me one moment to continue reading and absorbing
I am sad for your heartbreak and it sounds like a devastating situation. nothing worse than to have a break with your Son due to others lack of repspect for your relationship.
As bad as things are with the grandparents is there a way to have a coffee with them to talk about the importance of the mother son relationship?
I would do anything but they said if i even pulled in the driveway they would call the law on me for trepassing, so no thats not an option. In her mind i really think she thinks she's MY sons mother!
That does sound terrible. do you have the law on your side with the custody arrangement being that he is supposed to be living with your ex?
Yes maam i do, but they have my son so confused it would only make matters worse if i involved the law
If you have joint custody is he staying with you at all? i am desirous of you having some alone time with him not to slam or degrade the grandparents but to remind him of your love for him
NO he wont have any commucation with me at all. He really gets fused at if he even trys
It is awful to even say this but are you able to go a period of time giving him some space?
Not easy I know
I have given him ample space that is why im talking with you now. Me and my husband lost our home in a fire 2 months ago and his dad brought him to the house while everyone was there and it burning. He told me at that time "mom i waited to long to come home now its gone". He knows what he is doing is wrong but he has noone to encourage him to do whats right
I feel your pain and I support you in how you are feeling. I know you don't want to get the law involved for fear of alienating him further but if you feel he is not being taken care of in an appropriate way such as speaking and destroying his relationship with you then I think it is best to get someone involved maybe even through the school
I no that would only make things worse
is your usual way of communicating with him through text? If so, I would continue to let him know you are there when he is ready
does that feel doable?
we have always spoke on the phone and text both but i have tried both ways especially over the holidays only for it to fall on deaf ears. if i sent him a text reminding him he is doing me wrong (she sneeks and looks at his phone) they would come up with something else negative to say about me
well maybe the tenor should be more about you love him and are there when he is ready
I NO he knows how very much i love him! if i do that i feel it would only say to him that i condone his behaviour
I think he is fully aware that you don't condone his behavior and my worry is if you continue to tell him he has doen you wrong that he will move further from you and harder to reconnect. you might say something like, while I don't agree with your decisions, I love you and am here when you are ready.
I will try that thans for your time
My pleasure. I know that you are in a tough spot and I do hope I provided a measure of comfort and support