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KaterB1270, Teacher
Category: Parenting
Satisfied Customers: 142
Experience:  BS Family Consumer Sciences Ed. and Masters of Art in Teaching
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My 10 year old daughter says she hates herself , nobody likes

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My 10 year old daughter says she hates herself , nobody likes her and she says she ugly. She's had an emotional day( she was fighting with one of her friends) but she has said similar things recently and I'm not really sure how to respond, beyond telling her that I love her and that none of those things are true. It seems that there is a trend developing and I'm somewhat concerned. She is an only child and is somewhat of a perfectionist.
Submitted: 5 years ago.
Category: Parenting
Expert:  KaterB1270 replied 5 years ago.
Thank you for contacting Just Answer. In reading your post I heard the stress in your writing. I know children can be hard to understand especially during the pre-teen and teenage years. I think that based on the comments which were part of your question you daughter has a few different things going on right now. The emotionally difficult things that she went though today were both brought on by things past and present. Today in particular while dealing with the issue of her friend she acted out by putting herself down. This is a very typical reaction when things seem to go wrong for a young lady. Wether it is a friend fight, a boy problem, a family situation, or a school project they tend to respond by taking the blame which comes out by putting themselves down. This can be alarming for parents. Understandably so as the youngsters are always very upset at the time. As far as what you can do for her I would suggest trying the things below. 1. Continue to keep lines of communication open. Talk daily so that you know exactly what she is thinking and feeling. Keep track of things in case the situation should worsen. 2. Try to show her that unfortunately life is not perfect for anyone. Share your challenges as well as other family members so she understands that everyone goes through hardships at all ages.3. Teach her new ways to deal with stress. Some idease are journaling, exercising, meditation, yoga, drawing gardening, volunteering as well as any other ways you distress. 4. Monitor her moods and progress in her down talking to herself. If you see more issues arise consult your family doctor or a mental health specialist. I hope the ideas I shared above will be helpful to you. I know things seem turbulent right now but hang in there as parenting is a journey and the terrority is constantly changing. Please do not hesitate to contact me in the future for an update. If I have been helpful please ACCEPT my answer as this is the only way I am compensated for my expertise and answer. Kate
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