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proexpert37, Educator/Life Coach
Category: Parenting
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Experience:  Teacher 20+ years, Parent, Expert Mentor
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Can it do more harm than good if a parent spanks their child

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Can it do more harm than good if a parent spanks their child out of anger and frustration and WITHOUT explaining to the child why what they did is wrong? For example, without explaining to the child something like this: Son, I love you, but I am going to spank you because what you did was wrong. Son, imagine if you owned a donut shop and someone came and stole donuts and as a result, it would hurt your business. How would you feel? That's how the grocery store manager felt when you shoplifted from his store. That is why I am going to spank you because I want you to realize that it is wrong to steal and because I want you to grow up to be an honest adult. If a parent spanks a child WITHOUT taking the time to explain like that and the parent just spanks out of anger and frustration, can the child grow up to be bitter? Thank you for your assistance.
Hello and Thank You for consulting Just Answer. How old is the child you are referring to? Thanks!
Customer: replied 4 years ago.
At one point he was 5 and at another points he was 9, 10, 11, and 12.
Hello and Thank You for responding. Parents should never spank children when they are angry and frustrated. The parent needs to be calm, cool, and collected before spanking. .Parents tend to "lose it" and let their emotions overtake their actions when they are so upset. If spanking is the desired form of discipline, it should always be coupled with an explanation to the child as to what the undesired behavior was. However as children mature, they seem to become immune to spanking. What works best is talking to the child and taking away material objects for a while and limiting activities with friends. If spanking is done without explanations, the child may grow up very bitter. He/she will view spanking/hitting as an acceptable communication method. Children should be talked to. Open and honest communication is always the best method.
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