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proexpert37, Educator/Life Coach
Category: Parenting
Satisfied Customers: 1374
Experience:  Teacher 20+ years, Parent, Expert Mentor
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Please can you help my 11 year old boy

Customer Question

Please can you help my 11 year old boy who is very aggressive and hits his mum what help can I get.
Submitted: 4 years ago.
Category: Parenting
Expert:  Dr. Shirley Schaye replied 4 years ago.

Dr. Shirley Schaye :

I am very sorry to hear about the difficulties you are having with your son. Let me ask you a question. I see that in your response you mentioned that the country relating to your question is England but in the customer information it says US. So since you are offline now, the response I will give you is for help in England. If that is not correct, please let me know and I will redirect my response to where you are in the US. So... ... my response for England.

Dr. Shirley Schaye :

If it's in England contact the Anna Freud Centre. They have the VERY BEST treatment facilities for child treatment. You will need to contact them and ask them for someone in the area you are looking for.

Dr. Shirley Schaye :

"The Anna Freud Centre is committed to improving the emotional well-being of children and young people. We provide excellent treatments and services that work for young people who are suffering from mental health problems.

We offer short-term and long-term specialist treatments for children and families and we’re often called on when other treatments have failed. We advise and offer direct support to parents and provide help for children and young people in emotional distress and at risk, helping to put them back on track for a brighter future."

Dr. Shirley Schaye :

Dr. Shirley Schaye :

Children don't sit down and tell us what they are upset about/ what is bothering them. They act out. They show destructive behaviour. Because children don't talk that's why we child therapists do play therapy with children. The child when in a therapist's office will engage in play and then the therapist can interpret what is going on. Only by bringing him to a child therapist will you be able to determine what is going on with him. There is no way to guess what is going on without knowing further details. The Anna Freud Centre will certainly be able to help. Our very best trained child therapists here in the US were trained by people who trained at the Anna Freud Centre.

Dr. Shirley Schaye :


JACUSTOMER-gonwfvk5- :

great $58 answer

Expert:  Dr. Shirley Schaye replied 4 years ago.
I am sorry that you do not like my answer. I do not know this boy. Anyone who tells you why he is being aggressive with his mom and why he hits his mom without doing an in-person evaluation is just making up an answer to please you. It would be unethical and non-professional to say why he is being aggressive without knowing the nature of the relationship between him and his mom --- what is going on between him and his mom; what role his father plays; are there other children in the home; what are the ages of the other children if there are others; what is going on in school, etc., etc. There is no way to know and give a professional answer without having a very, very detailed history and without doing a diagnostic evaluation on him.
Expert:  proexpert37 replied 4 years ago.
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