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proexpert37, Educator/Life Coach
Category: Parenting
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Experience:  Teacher 20+ years, Parent, Expert Mentor
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We have a 13 year old daughter who has struggled with opening

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We have a 13 year old daughter who has struggled with opening up with people and making friends since kindergarten. She does have a hand full of friends, but we were wondering if you have any ideas of how she can increase her assertiveness to meet new people (not be as shy). It is especially tough for her in group settings when there are children around who are more outspoken than she is. Any suggestions of any books that she/we can read?
Submitted: 5 years ago.
Category: Parenting
Expert:  proexpert37 replied 5 years ago.
Hello and Thank You for using Just Answer. i am sorry to hear about the shyness of your daughter. What are activities that she is very interested in? What does she enjoy doing for fun? Thanks!!!
Customer: replied 5 years ago.
She is interested in animals & children (babies). She enjoys playing on the computer (Sims), reading, listening to music and recreational swimming (not competitive).
Expert:  proexpert37 replied 5 years ago.

As you know, all children are different. If you have discussed your daughter's shyness with her pediatrician and he or she is not too concerned, then your daughter may outgrow the shyness. But to alleviate some concerns, you can also have your daughter see a counselor and she can experience "talk therapy" to help her learn how to approach others and be more assertive.


Since your daughter has many strengths, you may want her to get involved with assisting younger kids with reading, music, computers, and animal appreciation. She could be a day counselor for younger kids at a summer camp. She needs to be in a position where she can be an overt leader with her age, knowledge, and skills. She will grow through experience by making plans and giving instructions. She will have to deal with successes and failures for her to grow in assertiveness and self confidence. Once she has learned to lead and teach younger kids, she will feel more confident around her own peers. This would be a great starting place for her.


Hope this provides a little insight. Have a great day!!!Laughing

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