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proexpert37
proexpert37, Educator/Life Coach
Category: Parenting
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Experience:  Teacher 20+ years, Parent, Expert Mentor
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My son is 18 and will attend college in August. He started

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My son is 18 and will attend college in August. He started smoking cigarettes and I would like him to quit before going to school. We went to counselor before and the counselor told us (me and my son) that my son had to want to quit. However, my son did not want to. What should I do? Now every time I talked about smoking, my son just said counselor said it is my own business. I'm very frustrated, I'm paying his tuition and I do not want him smoke. Is there something wrong with me or with my son?
Submitted: 3 years ago.
Category: Parenting
Expert:  multistatelaw replied 3 years ago.

Thank you for contacting Justanswer.com.

 

Are you looking for a legal answer, or information from a relationship expert?

 

Customer: replied 3 years ago.
Both
Expert:  multistatelaw replied 3 years ago.

I am not a relationship expert, but can provide legal information.

 

Would you like me to answer or wait for a relationship expert?

 

Customer: replied 3 years ago.
Wait for a relationship expert
Expert:  multistatelaw replied 3 years ago.

OK. Take care.

 

Customer: replied 3 years ago.
thanks. What can I do to make my son quit smoking? Or if I can do anything to make him quit. He is a good student.
Expert:  proexpert37 replied 3 years ago.

Hello and Thank You for using Just Answer. I am sorry to hear about the problem that you are having with your son. Besides the smoking disagreement, do you and your son have a good relationship?

Customer: replied 3 years ago.
Yes. However he wants a lot of privacy. His best friend smokes. My son likes smoking cig. and he said it gives him plessure.
Expert:  proexpert37 replied 3 years ago.

You are correct in that your son has to have the intrinsic desire to want to stop smoking. He is at the age of a legal adult and can decide many things for himself. You unfortunately cannot make him stop. Having a friend who smokes does not help the situation much. All you can do is continue to offer support , love, and guidance. Have him visit his physician to get a breathing test done. The physician can tell your son about all of the negative health issues that can come from smoking like emphysema and lung cancer. See if your doctor can even arrange a visit for you and your son to a terminal illness ward where many of the patients were former smokers so he can see the effects of breathing out of a hole in your throat...etc. Even tell him that maybe he can try the Nicoret gum or sucking on a lollipop instead of smoking. Do not give up on your son. He has time to change. Since you have already tried talking to him, you may want to write him a heartfelt letter expressing all of your inner feelings and concerns. I know how much you want your son to be around for years to come!!!

proexpert37, Educator/Life Coach
Category: Parenting
Satisfied Customers: 1374
Experience: Teacher 20+ years, Parent, Expert Mentor
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