How JustAnswer Works:

  • Ask an Expert
    Experts are full of valuable knowledge and are ready to help with any question. Credentials confirmed by a Fortune 500 verification firm.
  • Get a Professional Answer
    Via email, text message, or notification as you wait on our site.
    Ask follow up questions if you need to.
  • 100% Satisfaction Guarantee
    Rate the answer you receive.

Ask Dr. G. Your Own Question

Dr. G.
Dr. G., Psychologist
Category: Parenting
Satisfied Customers: 1467
Experience:  Licensed Psychologist in the state of Minnesota
15682972
Type Your Parenting Question Here...
Dr. G. is online now
A new question is answered every 9 seconds

Our daughter is 27 years old and lives under our roof with

Resolved Question:

Our daughter is 27 years old and lives under our roof with 2 her babies. We offered up our home to get her out of a bad situation & allow her the chance work on an assoc degree. Besides being in class 3days/week she works nights at a restaurant. She is gone most of the time and we take care of all of the boys needs (playing, feeding, bathing, bedtime etc). We have the boys all waking hours and she is on duty from midnite to 7 am or so. My husband and I are both in agreement that the boys wouldn't be taken care of well if they are not under our roof. It is exhausting but we asked for it. We know we are being taken advantage of, but my husband does not want to discuss anything uncomfortable with her. He is against charging rent or payment for anything. He doesn't want to make waves. %
Submitted: 3 years ago.
Category: Parenting
Expert:  Dr. G. replied 3 years ago.
What is she doing with the money? How is she taking advantage of you? How long will the two of you continue to tiptoe around your own home?
Customer: replied 3 years ago.

Dr. G -

In my opion, she basically blows the money. Sh eats every meal out. She grabs a cookie on her way to class but buys lunch every day after school with friends and eats at the restaurant at night and fast food whenever she is hungry. The rest of the paycheck goes for clothes for her and the boys. She likes to shop and I believe it is to avoid coming home and taking responsiblity at home, as it is uneccessary shopping. We feel taken advantage of because we are here to babysit (I hate to call it that when they are our grand children) anytime she is not home. On her nights off she tells us she is going out with friends and assumes we will take care of the boys. I tend to blow up every once in a while because it does build up. I am ashamed of my yelling as I would rather have a nice conversation. Daughter then gets mad and says she can't wait to move out and live her own life. Husband agrees with me but does not want to bring any uncomfortable subject up. She has lived with us off and on ever since she tried college and living on her own. Her bills were always late and she has been evicted about (3) times in 6 years. She tried marriage for 5 months to someone she did not know well. We have always bailed her out and I am wanting to see her grow up and take responsibility. We see her living her a few more years as she can at least get an associated degree.

Expert:  Dr. G. replied 3 years ago.
The botXXXXX XXXXXne in this situation is that she will take advantage of the two of you until you two put a stop to it. It is definitely time to lay down some ground rules in the house. The both of you need a social life too and it shouldn't always be with the grandkids. The two of you sit down with her and say that when she is in school then you will watch the children. Other than that, she is responsible for tending to the welfare of the children. You need to put this responsibility back on her. The two of you make your plans to go out of the house and leave her alone with the kids. No need to argue about it with her. Just keep your calm and say the only time I will watch them is when you work. She needs to figure it out otherwise. If she cannot abide by this then she is free to leave anytime.
Dr. G., Psychologist
Category: Parenting
Satisfied Customers: 1467
Experience: Licensed Psychologist in the state of Minnesota
Dr. G. and other Parenting Specialists are ready to help you

JustAnswer in the News:

 
 
 
Ask-a-doc Web sites: If you've got a quick question, you can try to get an answer from sites that say they have various specialists on hand to give quick answers... Justanswer.com.
JustAnswer.com...has seen a spike since October in legal questions from readers about layoffs, unemployment and severance.
Web sites like justanswer.com/legal
...leave nothing to chance.
Traffic on JustAnswer rose 14 percent...and had nearly 400,000 page views in 30 days...inquiries related to stress, high blood pressure, drinking and heart pain jumped 33 percent.
Tory Johnson, GMA Workplace Contributor, discusses work-from-home jobs, such as JustAnswer in which verified Experts answer people’s questions.
I will tell you that...the things you have to go through to be an Expert are quite rigorous.
 
 
 

What Customers are Saying:

 
 
 
  • Wonderful service, prompt, efficient, and accurate. Couldn't have asked for more. I cannot thank you enough for your help. Mary C. Freshfield, Liverpool, UK
< Last | Next >
  • Wonderful service, prompt, efficient, and accurate. Couldn't have asked for more. I cannot thank you enough for your help. Mary C. Freshfield, Liverpool, UK
  • This expert is wonderful. They truly know what they are talking about, and they actually care about you. They really helped put my nerves at ease. Thank you so much!!!! Alex Los Angeles, CA
  • Thank you for all your help. It is nice to know that this service is here for people like myself, who need answers fast and are not sure who to consult. GP Hesperia, CA
  • I couldn't be more satisfied! This is the site I will always come to when I need a second opinion. Justin Kernersville, NC
  • Just let me say that this encounter has been entirely professional and most helpful. I liked that I could ask additional questions and get answered in a very short turn around. Esther Woodstock, NY
  • Thank you so much for taking your time and knowledge to support my concerns. Not only did you answer my questions, you even took it a step further with replying with more pertinent information I needed to know. Robin Elkton, Maryland
  • He answered my question promptly and gave me accurate, detailed information. If all of your experts are half as good, you have a great thing going here. Diane Dallas, TX
 
 
 

Meet The Experts:

 
 
 
  • Rafael M.T.Therapist

    Family Counselor

    Satisfied Customers:

    108
    MHT-MHRS-MS-MA Integral Psychotherapist & Life Coach
< Last | Next >
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/IN/intrapsyc.com/2012-2-20_161928_RGMTPicturex5002012.64x64.png Rafael M.T.Therapist's Avatar

    Rafael M.T.Therapist

    Family Counselor

    Satisfied Customers:

    108
    MHT-MHRS-MS-MA Integral Psychotherapist & Life Coach
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/jhollo77/2010-2-6_651_Avatar.jpg Jennifer's Avatar

    Jennifer

    School Psychologist

    Satisfied Customers:

    77
    Collaborative parent consultation on everything from modifying behavior to child development.
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/VO/vodkas25/2012-1-29_16528_P1010831.64x64.JPG professional_Alison's Avatar

    professional_Alison

    Child Care

    Satisfied Customers:

    77
    Degree in early years,16 years experience in childcare
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/HU/hungryjack20/IMG_1281_edit_2.64x64.jpg Dr. L's Avatar

    Dr. L

    Psychologist

    Satisfied Customers:

    40
    Licensed as psychologist and marriage and family therapist
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/KA/KaterB1270/2012-5-2_17226_016.64x64.jpg KaterB1270's Avatar

    KaterB1270

    Teacher

    Satisfied Customers:

    18
    BS Family Consumer Sciences Ed. and Masters of Art in Teaching
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/KA/Kansastherapist/2012-6-13_171911_4upon20120220at14.64x64.jpg KansasTherapist's Avatar

    KansasTherapist

    LSCSW

    Satisfied Customers:

    17
    17 years experience with depression, abuse, and borderline.
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/norriem/2009-5-27_134249_nm.jpg NormanM's Avatar

    NormanM

    Author, lecturer and psychotherapist.

    Satisfied Customers:

    16
    ADHP(NC), DHP, ECP, UKCP Registered