Have you tried a play therapist for him? You're asking how to help him correct?
Play therapists are counselors who work with young children such as your son. They rely on tools such as narrative therapy and structured play therapy (they are trained and credentialed in this) You do not have to wait until you move (unless you will be moving shortly in the next month or so) If you would be relocating in the next few weeks, then it is better to wait only so he does not get to bond with the therapist and then have to leave. Your insurance company may let you know which ones are in your network or you may find out through the Association for Play Therapy which will show you who's registered in the area where you'd live. Make sure that the counselor is also experienced in grief and loss issues.
As far as getting help for yourself, don't discount counseling. If that therapist did not work for you, find another. There are also online support grief groups as well as you may be able to find some in your area by calling the United Way toll free # XXXXX
There is also online counseling via sites such as metanoia.org or liveperson.com
Self Hypnosis, Overcome Grief and Loss Hypnotherapy CD - Audio CD by Rachael Eccles
The Other Side of Sadness: What the New Science of Bereavement Tells Us About Life After Loss by George A. Bonanno (Paperback)