How JustAnswer Works:

  • Ask an Expert
    Experts are full of valuable knowledge and are ready to help with any question. Credentials confirmed by a Fortune 500 verification firm.
  • Get a Professional Answer
    Via email, text message, or notification as you wait on our site.
    Ask follow up questions if you need to.
  • 100% Satisfaction Guarantee
    Rate the answer you receive.

Ask proexpert37 Your Own Question

proexpert37
proexpert37, Educator/Life Coach
Category: Parenting
Satisfied Customers: 1374
Experience:  Teacher 20+ years, Parent, Expert Mentor
49595756
Type Your Parenting Question Here...
proexpert37 is online now
A new question is answered every 9 seconds

My 8 year old son Jack still sleeps in my bed, his dad and

Resolved Question:

My 8 year old son Jack still sleeps in my bed, his dad and myself separated in 2006. I let him sleep with me then as I did not think I could possibly be doing him any harm. It was not a very pleasant separation from him father he moved in with his new partner about 2 months after leaving our marital home. We went through mediation and agreed to have shared custody of Jack, his dad Ryan was a brilliant father he thought the world of Jack. My only concern was that he bad mouthed me to Jack. Tragically his daddy died in 2009 2 months after getting married. I have had a lot of support since then from Ryans mum and dad and Jack has a very close relationship with them. However today Jack asked me what social services was. I tried to explain and he said the his Grandad had told him off and that if he carried on sleeping in my bed he would phone social services. I find this disturbing to say the least and am still in disbelief at what he said any why. Before his dad died their was quite a lot of anamosity between us although nothing was actually said to my face, Ryan had quite a lot to say and a lot of it was not true. However I had a good support network of friends and for Jacks sake I had to try and not let it bother me. However now all my concerns have flooded back to me. After Ryan died I decided to give them the benefit of the doubt and wipe the slate clean, they had lost their only son and Jack his beloved daddy. I decided there and then that they needed Jack as much as he needed them. Until today I thought that they had got to know the real me without listening to the horrible things that Ryan said about me. Even though other people had told me that they only really put up with me because they had to I still thought that we had a mutual respect and understanding. I care about these people a lot and I guess I deep down I thought that they felt the same way and now I am wondering what they are really thinking and how I could have been so gullible. I love my son and do not want any unpleasantness but I can not pretend it has not been said how can I approach Grandad without things getting messy. I am physically shaking right now, and also can social services take this matter further if they are informed. Have I broken the law. PLEASE PLEASE will you help me in this matter. I will see them in the morning and really do not know how to handle this situation. As far as I am aware only Jack and his Grandad were present when this conversation took place, I am a single parent and am sat here thinking that they do not think I am a good parent hope you can help many thanks . . . G Harrison
Submitted: 3 years ago.
Category: Parenting
Expert:  proexpert37 replied 3 years ago.

You have not broken any law by simply having your son sleep in the same bed with you as long as there is no abuse of any kind happening. You seem to be a very loving and supportive mother. You have nothing to hide from social services. You may want to try limiting the co sleeping arrangements to only the weekends and then not at all as your son is getting older.

 

What you can also do is sit down with the grandparents and have an open and honest discussion about how you feel about things and they need to state how they feel. Maybe there are some misunderstandings that need to be brought out in the open and cleared up. If you have a family member that can attend the conversation, then have them come as well but tell the grandparents that you will be bringing that person.

 

The grandparents may be upset at some other issues and taking it out on you and putting their grandson in the middle of all of this. If the grandparents do not want to talk with you, then you may want to seek professional therapy/counseling for you and your son.

 

If you need more advice, just ask.

proexpert37, Educator/Life Coach
Category: Parenting
Satisfied Customers: 1374
Experience: Teacher 20+ years, Parent, Expert Mentor
proexpert37 and other Parenting Specialists are ready to help you

JustAnswer in the News:

 
 
 
Ask-a-doc Web sites: If you've got a quick question, you can try to get an answer from sites that say they have various specialists on hand to give quick answers... Justanswer.com.
JustAnswer.com...has seen a spike since October in legal questions from readers about layoffs, unemployment and severance.
Web sites like justanswer.com/legal
...leave nothing to chance.
Traffic on JustAnswer rose 14 percent...and had nearly 400,000 page views in 30 days...inquiries related to stress, high blood pressure, drinking and heart pain jumped 33 percent.
Tory Johnson, GMA Workplace Contributor, discusses work-from-home jobs, such as JustAnswer in which verified Experts answer people’s questions.
I will tell you that...the things you have to go through to be an Expert are quite rigorous.
 
 
 

What Customers are Saying:

 
 
 
  • Wonderful service, prompt, efficient, and accurate. Couldn't have asked for more. I cannot thank you enough for your help. Mary C. Freshfield, Liverpool, UK
< Last | Next >
  • Wonderful service, prompt, efficient, and accurate. Couldn't have asked for more. I cannot thank you enough for your help. Mary C. Freshfield, Liverpool, UK
  • This expert is wonderful. They truly know what they are talking about, and they actually care about you. They really helped put my nerves at ease. Thank you so much!!!! Alex Los Angeles, CA
  • Thank you for all your help. It is nice to know that this service is here for people like myself, who need answers fast and are not sure who to consult. GP Hesperia, CA
  • I couldn't be more satisfied! This is the site I will always come to when I need a second opinion. Justin Kernersville, NC
  • Just let me say that this encounter has been entirely professional and most helpful. I liked that I could ask additional questions and get answered in a very short turn around. Esther Woodstock, NY
  • Thank you so much for taking your time and knowledge to support my concerns. Not only did you answer my questions, you even took it a step further with replying with more pertinent information I needed to know. Robin Elkton, Maryland
  • He answered my question promptly and gave me accurate, detailed information. If all of your experts are half as good, you have a great thing going here. Diane Dallas, TX
 
 
 

Meet The Experts:

 
 
 
  • Rafael M.T.Therapist

    Family Counselor

    Satisfied Customers:

    108
    MHT-MHRS-MS-MA Integral Psychotherapist & Life Coach
< Last | Next >
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/IN/intrapsyc.com/2012-2-20_161928_RGMTPicturex5002012.64x64.png Rafael M.T.Therapist's Avatar

    Rafael M.T.Therapist

    Family Counselor

    Satisfied Customers:

    108
    MHT-MHRS-MS-MA Integral Psychotherapist & Life Coach
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/jhollo77/2010-2-6_651_Avatar.jpg Jennifer's Avatar

    Jennifer

    School Psychologist

    Satisfied Customers:

    77
    Collaborative parent consultation on everything from modifying behavior to child development.
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/VO/vodkas25/2012-1-29_16528_P1010831.64x64.JPG professional_Alison's Avatar

    professional_Alison

    Child Care

    Satisfied Customers:

    77
    Degree in early years,16 years experience in childcare
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/HU/hungryjack20/IMG_1281_edit_2.64x64.jpg Dr. L's Avatar

    Dr. L

    Psychologist

    Satisfied Customers:

    40
    Licensed as psychologist and marriage and family therapist
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/norriem/2009-5-27_134249_nm.jpg NormanM's Avatar

    NormanM

    Author, lecturer and psychotherapist.

    Satisfied Customers:

    19
    ADHP(NC), DHP, ECP, UKCP Registered
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/KA/KaterB1270/2012-5-2_17226_016.64x64.jpg KaterB1270's Avatar

    KaterB1270

    Teacher

    Satisfied Customers:

    18
    BS Family Consumer Sciences Ed. and Masters of Art in Teaching
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/KA/Kansastherapist/2012-6-13_171911_4upon20120220at14.64x64.jpg KansasTherapist's Avatar

    KansasTherapist

    LSCSW

    Satisfied Customers:

    17
    17 years experience with depression, abuse, and borderline.
 
 
 

Related Parenting Questions

Chat Now With A Parenting Counselor
proexpert37
proexpert37
Educator
702 Satisfied Customers
Teacher 20+ years, Parent, Expert Mentor