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proexpert37, Educator/Life Coach
Category: Parenting
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Experience:  Teacher 20+ years, Parent, Expert Mentor
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I have a 7 year old and he plays in a church basketball league

Customer Question

I have a 7 year old and he plays in a church basketball league that is very non-competitive but he has an issues when he does not get involved in the lays and the ball is not shared (at this age they all just want to shoot). This is the 6th game and during every game he has a crying outburst even though he knows it wrong and that it disappoints his family and is very sad after because he knows its wrong but just cant seem to get it under contol while it's happening. What type of person might be good for him to talk to?
Submitted: 5 years ago.
Category: Parenting
Expert:  proexpert37 replied 5 years ago.
Hello my friend. Is this your son's first experience with a sport? Does he seem to enjoy it? What is the coach like? Just trying to understand the big picture.
Customer: replied 5 years ago.
Its a church setting, the league is called Upward I'm sure you could find info online if needed. Very low key no score is kept it's based on teaching good sportsmanship. The coach is one of the church preachers. This is the second year he played but he has been playing group sports for two years and says he wants to play, we don't make him. The issue begins when he wants to be involved and the other kids really just want to shoot themselves not really wanting to share the ball alot. Jack is not very agressive so unless the ball is passed to him he does not get it alot. Then the crying starts and that will lead to some anger toward the other players. We talk before and after games and I really believe he tries to control it but can't. Afterwards he is also very sorry and cries because he knows he has disappointed us.
Expert:  proexpert37 replied 5 years ago.
Your son needs to be have more experiences with individuals not sharing the ball so that he can develop coping strategies. You and your spouse and any other siblings, cousins, etc. can have casual practice shoot around basketball games so that your son will understand that he will not always get the ball. Then when he does not have the ball, you can teach him to say "I'm open" and wave his hands around. You will have to explain to him that he may or may not get the ball passed to him. He must also learn that it is necessary to cooperate in a team sport. You can even have him watch college or pro basketball teams on television so that he can see that those players do not even get the ball all of the time but they do not give up and keep playing. He will learn from examples and understand how to react better.

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