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proexpert37, Educator/Life Coach
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I am seperated from an abusive husband. I have a dear friend

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I am seperated from an abusive husband. I have a dear friend who my relationship has evolved to us being intimate but not having sex. My estranged husband told my 13 yr old son that I am *ucking my friend. Not true now but I have storng feelings for him. He said this to try and force me back into the realtionship as my 13 yr old and now insisting that Dad is lonely and I should go back to him. After over 20 years of abuse I finally was able to break the cycle. I am petrified of going back. What should I say to my son
Submitted: 5 years ago.
Category: Parenting
Expert:  proexpert37 replied 5 years ago.

You have spoken the appropriate words to your son. But if you fear going back to your husband, I would be concerned. You cannot change your husbands ways..only your ways. When you mentioned that you were finally able to break the cycle, what exactly were you referring to? Has your husband stopped being abusive? Possible on going marriage counseling or individual counseling/therapy may assist you and your husband. Your husband may seem to have changed simply to "win" you back. He may have been jealous of the untrue fact that you had a relationship with your male friend. If you do return to your husband, he may act in a loving and positive way but the abusive behavior may soon return. It will take much more than your husband simply saying that he is lonely to change. For your mental and physical health, I would seek professional assistance before recommitting to the relationship. Also, you can receive assistance in what specifically to say to your son because your husband has put your son in the middle of this adult situation.


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