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Dr. Rossi
Dr. Rossi, Licensed Psychotherapist
Category: Parenting
Satisfied Customers: 4627
Experience:  Certified Hypnotherapist, Parenting Book Author, 13+ years of experience.
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My 19 year old daughter came home with a dog. We already have

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My 19 year old daughter came home with a dog. We already have 4 animals (3cats and a dog) from her bringing home strays. Within the past 3 months she has brought home 3 kittens and an English Bull dog, all of which I found homes for. This particular dog she got from a shelter, not the streets. She insists on keeping it. My husband and I said absolutely not. The next day my daughter and I went to our usual counseling session. I could have fell off my chair when the therapist said my daughter should be able to keep the dog if she follows a set of rules. Well, my daughter is trying, but isn't exactly keeping up with the clean up. there's feces on the floor of her room and now the dog just ate her fish of 2 years. My husband is taking the dog away on Wednesday. My daughter is screaming that the fish incident was an accident. Mind you the dog ate my son's game controller, 2 cell phone chargers and 2 hair straighteners. My questions are should the therapist have said it was ok to keep the dog even though we were railroaded into it? and am I doing the right thing now to just get it a new home?

Hi,

 

What counselors say in the sessions is usually a suggestion. It is your home and you ultimately decide what goes on there. Your daughter at 19 is considered an adult and has to display the responsibilities of an adult. You can consider either 1/ give her a time frame during which she can prove herself, 2/ let her know this is your home and the dog may get more attention and care at another home. It is not the dog's fault; the owner has to discipline and teach it what is expected.

 

You are not rocking the boat. You're making sure that your daughter is a responsible adult. As far as the ADD, that ought not to always be considered a cause for someone's behavior. There are always going to be cases when the behavior is driven by something else- opportunism, habit, trying to get away with things, irresponsibility/relying on others, etc.

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