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Dr. Rossi
Dr. Rossi, Licensed Psychotherapist
Category: Parenting
Satisfied Customers: 4627
Experience:  Certified Hypnotherapist, Parenting Book Author, 13+ years of experience.
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I have been seperated for 4 years, we have 3 children 15,13,

Resolved Question:

I have been seperated for 4 years, we have 3 children 15,13, and 8. My ex stops by my house on a daily basis. He comes over whenever he wants. I let it go cuz I thought it would be good for the children. How do you feel about this issue
Submitted: 5 years ago.
Category: Parenting
Expert:  Dr. Rossi replied 5 years ago.



The children will need contact with their father. But, he would need to call you and make arrangements because now this is your home and he has to respect that.


If you find his behavior inconvenient, talk to him about some flexibility on his end. It would also depend on whether or not you share custody. If you do, he can take the kids to visit him once in a while or see if he can take them out to spend fun time together.


It would all depend on what the two of you as adults decide as long as it does not interfere with your legal obligations.

Customer: replied 5 years ago.
I have custody of the children, 2 girls and 1 boy, he spends a lot of time with our son. He never has the girls overnite, nor does he spend anytime with the girls unless he comes over and spends time at the house. He will take are son for the weekend, but the time is so unfair. I worry about the favoritism aspect. It is very evident. Would you recommend that I close the open door policy. Personally I just try to keep him in the kids life, but I would much rather not have him in my house. Guess my question is......does it benefit the children
Expert:  Dr. Rossi replied 5 years ago.
Children benefit having contact with their father if he is not abusive to them. If you prevent him from seeing them, one day they may hold it against you. Even if he showing favoritism, it would have to be their interpretation that they will use (not yours) If one of the older kids tells you they do not want to see him, that's another issue. Try to look at the big picture of the long term effect of his contact with them. Afterall, they are his kids as well as yours .
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