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proexpert37
proexpert37, Educator/Life Coach
Category: Parenting
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Experience:  Teacher 20+ years, Parent, Expert Mentor
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I have a two year old hyper boy,who wont stop screaming if

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I have a two year old hyper boy,who wont stop screaming if he dosent get his way,ive tried talking to him, Putting him on the naughty step,etc,its very difficult when you bring him anywhere public,We also have four month old twins,Which he keeps scratching there faces and really hurting them,We give him as much attention as we possibly can,we have tried talking explaning gently to him with the babies,But to no avail,We are at our wits end but dont no what to do next please can you advise.
Submitted: 3 years ago.
Category: Parenting
Expert:  proexpert37 replied 3 years ago.
Your son is in the stage of life where he feels that everything should revolve around him. He is having a very difficult time not being the center of attention anymore. If possible, have you tried doing activities without the twins around? Also, have you tried to include him in the activities that you do with the twins..such as ...bring them a bottle,diaper, toy, pacifier, or whatever. He must learn that the twins are here to stay. Try not to give in to his demands so much. Sometimes he will just have to cry it out and you will have to ignore his behavior. Tell him the way you expect him to behave and even role play before you go places. He is still rather young but it is worth the effort. Also, set up a behavior chart for him. If he has a great day, he receives a sticker. If he has a bad day, he receives nothing. After 5 days of stickers, he gets a treat or is able to go some place fun. Make a big deal about getting the stickers. His positive behavior is what needs the attention now.
Customer: replied 3 years ago.
We feel he is to young to understand the sticker system,and role play,He is only starting to say a few words,Even when we punish him we feel he dosent understand as he still continues to be naughty,I have included him in bath time with the twins,getting dypers going for walks gently stroking them etc,But as soon as my husband or I pick them up he smiles, but i see his eyes change to jelousey,and sure enough he will scrape them or hurt them later.Have also tried to do seperate activities without the twins, but as soon as were back home again he demands attention so he will start to scream at the highest volume possible,
Expert:  proexpert37 replied 3 years ago.

Your son is simply exhibiting attention seeking temper tantrums. Try this approach...completely ignore the tantrum. When he finally stops, immediately praise him. Give this a few days and see if this works. You are in control..not your son.

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Edited by Erica.13 on 10/24/2010 at 9:21 PM EST
Customer: replied 3 years ago.

we have tried ignoring the tantrums but he still goes back screaming,thank you for the sugestion,I will try praising him immediately after and see how that goes.Have you any other suggestions and on what to do when i find him scraping one of the twins? or on simple rewards for todlers of a young age that he will understand more suggestions please???

 

Expert:  proexpert37 replied 3 years ago.

Remember that your son has only been in the world for 2 years. He does not have all of the language skills that he needs to express his needs so he in turn will act out. Make sure that you teach, guide, role model, and set firm limits. The next time that he is hitting one of the twins :1 Kneel down to his eye level 2. Sternly tell him "No Hitting" 3. Then take his hand and touch the spot where he just hit his sibling and say "Nice hands" while gently touching his sibling. Be consistent with this.

 

Also make sure that his diet is good because that can affect his behavior.

 

As for rewards for children his age: play time at the park, a visit to see a favorite relative, inviting a friend over, treat to a favorite kid friendly eating establishment, at home movie,

more play time with toys...etc.

 

With the toys, I never had all of them available. I always put some away in the closet for my children. When they behaved well I grabbed a closet toy and they thought the toys were new and were just so excited.

 

Hope this helps!!!

 

 

proexpert37, Educator/Life Coach
Category: Parenting
Satisfied Customers: 1374
Experience: Teacher 20+ years, Parent, Expert Mentor
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