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Bonnie, Psychologist
Category: Parenting
Satisfied Customers: 2189
Experience:  and pediatric nurse practitioner with 30 years of experience counseling parents.
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We did a short trial last week and he cried for 10 minutes

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We did a short trial last week and he cried for 10 minutes when I left and then played, but every 5 minutes asked for me, cried a bit and then played more. It seemed like he could "manage" but it did seem stressful. I don't know if it is developmentally valuable to learn to handle this kind of stress or if it is unnecessary at this point.
Yes, the developmental task he is learning is Individuation and it is an important one. The trick is finding the balance. His stress is about "is she coming back?". He will eventually feel confident that you are and the stress will be relieved. So maybe the thing to do is come back earlier (after 30 minutes) and then very gradually increase the time.
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