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Dr. Keane
Dr. Keane, Family Counselor
Category: Parenting
Satisfied Customers: 1760
Experience:  Parenting Workshops, Teacher, PHD Clinical Psychology, 30 yrs. Exp. 4 Children
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My Child keeps hitting kids at day care. The more we ask him

Resolved Question:

My Child keeps hitting kids at day care. The more we ask him not to do so, the more he does that the next day. I feel that the day case personnel are not so willing to take the extra step to help him change his behavior. I feel like I have hit a wall and do not know what to do.
Submitted: 6 years ago.
Category: Parenting
Expert:  Dr. Keane replied 6 years ago.
Hi, how old is your son
Customer: replied 6 years ago.
2 years 9 months
Expert:  Dr. Keane replied 6 years ago.
Hi, I would be more concerned about the protocol at the day care center. What do they do when he is hits another child. Once the event has occurred there is no use to giving time outs after the fact. You have to correct when the behavior occurs . Spanking is reinforcing hitting. You spank him, he hits others. He is only a toddler. It is not that he doesn't care, it's that he isn't cognitively able to get the concept, he's too young. All you can do is make sure that the day care corrects when it happens and if you see it, you correct by telling him no, hands are not for hitting. Don't yell, spank or take anything away. Remove the child and have him sit in a chair for two minutes (a minute for every year), if he gets up, put him back and do it as many times as it takes. Stay calm and focused. He'll get it eventually. It's hard work but well worth it.
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