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Dr. Rossi
Dr. Rossi, Licensed Psychotherapist
Category: Parenting
Satisfied Customers: 4627
Experience:  Certified Hypnotherapist, Parenting Book Author, 13+ years of experience.
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My 3.5 yr old son has a 4.5 yr old friend who lives in our

Customer Question

My 3.5 yr old son has a 4.5 yr old friend who lives in our neighborhood. The boys were playing a couple weeks ago unsupervised upstairs in my son's room. As it turns out, the 4.5 yr old's mom informed me today that her son told her that he and my son had "touched penises" and "licked penises". I am quite disturbed by this revelation and feel guilty that I left them alone without supervision. It will not happen again. Is this behavior in 3-4 yr old's way out of the ordinary? I told my son that this was not acceptable behavior and that he should not allow anyone to touch his private area accept for the doctor or mom or dad. Any other advice on how to handle this situation?
Submitted: 7 years ago.
Category: Parenting
Expert:  Dr. Rossi replied 7 years ago.

Good Evening,


The behavior is not uncommon as at that age children become more curious about that bodily part. Touching and showing is more common than having oral contact.

You have already done well to inform him of the proper way of touching and when it is acceptable to touch there. When you correct him just do what you did (explain) versus punish or shame (some parents do so and it is not healthy)



Edited by Dr. Rossi on 10/9/2009 at 11:38 PM EST