Hello and welcome to Just Answer !
The book, Unconditional Parenting, is one person's idea of how to deal with a child on a one by one basis !
What is your question, pertaining to this book, or is there some other issue you need an answer to about it or parenting ?
Danny: What I am trying to say is that as a child who was severely spanked(My mother's quote in later years : "Dad spanked Evan so hard once I thought he was going to kill him."I was too young to know what it was for-about 2&1/2y and who was a spanker with my own children having not found help yet to break free of my controlling father until they were pretty well grown up, to now knowing that any type of coercion in child-rearing is wrong and am totally in tune with Alfie Kohn's ideas. You would have to browse through his whole book on Unconditional Parenting also his other books The Homework Myth, The Punishment of Rewards, Competition-How we all lose in the race to win, and many other books which you can learn about by accessing his web site by entering his name in search.
It's not just "one persons idea" of parenting. Pam Leo's Connection Parenting, Love not Coercion book is similar and I think the better of the two as a day to day guide to parents,(an interview of Pam Leo can be heard on line by going to www.atlc.org
The above two are recent publications. There is Barbara Colorosso, writer and lecturer who wrote Kids Are Worth It, also non coercive parenting- She states that the golden rule applies to parenting- Quote"I will not do to a child what I would not want done to myself."
Also_ How To Talk So Children Will Listen And Listen So Children Will Talk by Adele Faber & Elaine Mazlish(grown children of their own as the above)Also wrote How To Talk So Kids Can Learn-At home and in school. Another on Sibling Rivalry- Put out courses for parenting groups to use.
Also XXXXX XXXXX Ph.D. wrote book entitled 'For Your own Good' Hidden cruelty in child-rearing the roots of violence. Never had a book that I high-lighted so much in- also her others.
You Know Danny there is a saying :"You are known by the company you keep." So in that vein, I hope what I have written tells you about me, as I am now. Of course that depends on your sense of values.
BotXXXXX XXXXXne; Children can grow up being autonomous (happy)every step of the way, as opposed to being subservient and co-dependent.
Parenting begins prenatal, natural child birth needed followed by Kangaroo Mother Care(as the humans brain is not fully developed at birth)
Danny my problem is that I was born a century too soon, as paying attention to how we feel,(women and children included)is just beginning to catch on. I was born Feb. 11, 1923. Been looking for such people since Jan.1980. was only 57y then.
I support repeal of S.43, now before the Canadian Parliament.S.43 is an 1892 section of the Can. Criminal Code that legalizes parents hitting their children. For details see www.repeal43.org
I am on the mailing list of www.nospank.net
web site for PTAVE(Parents and Teachers Against Violence in Education. There are 21 States in the USA where it is still legal to paddle children in schools, secondary school even. 17y olds, girls included. Jordon Riak of nospank is working very hard to get that stopped - keeps track of what is going on in Canada and the world in that respect. A very informative web site.
Don't know where you are writing from.
Looking forward to hearing back from you.
Evan Grant, Kingsville, Ontario, Canada. N9Y 1V4
the most Southerly town in Canada- just a few feet above the 42nd parallel of latitude N which divides California and Oregon. I am near Detroit, Michigan
PS- I neglected to say that I needed a friend, an advocate as I did in my original inquiry.