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danny541, Parenting Answer Team
Category: Parenting
Satisfied Customers: 909
Experience:  Have 5 children !
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My 7 year old son likes to break anything he sees and ...

Customer Question

My 7 year old son likes to break anything he see's and likes to be the center of attention. how can i help him?
Submitted: 9 years ago.
Category: Parenting
Expert:  danny541 replied 9 years ago.

Hello and welcome to Just Answer !

Could I ask a few questions first ?

Does he ever give a reason for why he breaks something ?

Is there been any changes in the house within the last few months ? New baby, separation or divorce, arguing around him, a death in the family ?

What have you tried so far ?

Customer: replied 9 years ago.
There is no reason he does it.

He has seen us arguing a few times.

we have been yelling at him because of things he is not suppose to do.

But even sometimes when we talk to him in a normal voice , he still doesn't want to listen.

He is a very sensitive kid. And a big whiner.

We've tried time out, no playing outside, take toys away. But it still continues.
Expert:  danny541 replied 9 years ago.

What exactly is he breaking ?

What happens after he has broken the item, what was your reaction ?

I'm sorry for all the questions, but the more I know the better answer I can give about the situation !

Customer: replied 9 years ago.
Most of the time his toys and other things around the house.

I get mad and ask him why he did it and he always blames other people for his actions.
Expert:  danny541 replied 9 years ago.

Lots of kids will break toy's, favorite cd's that they like to watch, sometimes it can be because they want to figure out just how they work. The solution is if they are expecting you to replace those toys or objects then the best way I have found is to make them pay for it themselves.

Also they need to understand that things cost money, they are not free and money does not grow on trees.

You can solve this by writing down a list of chooses for his age that he can do to earn the money back to pay for the item, also no more toy's or special things until he quits breaking them.

At his age he is going to break things and blame others, you need to explain to him that everytime he does something like breaking a toy, don't lose your temper, if you do or you give in to his whining then he will win, and get the attention he wants, sometimes even bad attention is better than none.

Now I'm sure you give your son quality time with just him, but if he is seeking approval and isn't getting what he feels he needs then he knows if he breaks things he will get that attention.

Try explaining to him, that you love him very much you and your husband together, but if the bad behavior continues there will be punishment. Do not give into whining the more he does and you give in, he will just continue and get worse, meanwhile, check into places like CafeMom to talk to other parents that are experiencing the same problems, all kids go through this and it can help to have a shoulder or a support system there to help when its needed !