New Zealand Law
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It is possible to get bail varied, but as you have been advised, it is likely the police will oppose while he pleads not guilty. He could try, but it is unlikely the judge would permit this, while the case is still waiting a date for the trial. His lawyer would need to try, if this is important. Normally in violence cases, mediation is not an option, but if there was no injury, then this could be an option to try to sort this, and try to get your husband to change his stance, for the greater good of your family. Otherwise you just have to wait until the trial.