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what is the best way to approach getting sole custody for a baby by the father?
Optional Information: Country relating to Question: New Zealand Already Tried: talking to a lawyer
Hi Welcome to JustAnswer. My first response will follow shortly. Please feel free to follow up if anything is not clear
You need to keep focused on the central issue which is the best interests of the child, and how that can be achieved. Concentrate on what you can offer the child and why the best interests of the child are served by you having a full time parenting order (custody). Do not spend time attacking the mother, unless there is a serious and genuine reason (drug or alcohol abuse, unsuitable partner, violence). Ensure you have a clear plan for education and good housing and family support.
Prepare and be prepared for compromise if this is needed, so you do not appear unreasonable.
Thankyou for your response. Yes there are grounds. It is not an attack on the mother, it is becoming increasingly obvious to people around her that she is unstable mentally and care and attention of baby is continually compromised. It is hard to prove negligence but baby is the one who suffers here she has been hospitalised twice because the mother did not pick up the signs earlier. in the recent incident she refused to take baby to the doctor. the fathers lawyer had to talk to her lawyer before she would take baby - the doctor told the mother baby needed to be hospitalised immediately. must the father wait until baby is hospitalised again and again before something is done, or worse she dies? the father is distraught and rightly so.it is clear he has no rights. i believe it is a matter of urgency. the father is young self employed and is already putting in place your suggestions above about baby's future. he has strong family support and a home.
my question then is: does mental instability not get taken into consideration in these cases? it would be so much easier to walk away and forget about everything, but the father can't leave baby in this situation. he is struggling with the best and quickest way to resolve this for the wellbeing of baby and fears for her safety
In cases like this it is possible to get a psychologists report which may open up this issue. And there should also be a CYFS report, and a lawyer for the child involved. Together they may determine whether she does have some problems which make it unsuitable for her to have full time parenting.
Thankyou. Is this something his lawyer could put in place about the psychologist report? or does he have to do this himself. What if the mother of the baby refuses to let a psychologist see her?Some of his family members are already talking about getting cyfs involved if nothing is resolved sooner, but is this really the best approach i.e.cyfs. scared baby may not be returned to family or worse the father may be in a worse position
The lawyer will ask the court to order this report. If she refuses, and you lay a proper basis, she will run the risk that this will be used against her. CYFS may get involved anyway as they would normally also prepare a report
Experience: LLB MMgt FAMINZ 32 years qualified as lawyer