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LeahMSWuofm, Clinical Social Worker
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 233
Experience:  10 years post-MSW experience
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I am single and 24 not living at home. A sibling of mine

Customer Question

hi I am single and 24 not living at home. A sibling of mine called me that she is separating. THis is very suprising...what are the most normal feelings to have
JA: Have you seen a doctor about this yet? What medications are you taking?
Customer: no
JA: Anything else in your medical history you think the psychologist should know?
Customer: no I'm a healthy person
Submitted: 14 days ago.
Category: Mental Health
Expert:  LeahMSWuofm replied 14 days ago.

Hello and thanks for writing to us. My name is***** that would be a big surprise, especially if it came out of nowhere. There will probably be a whole range of feelings that you have in reaction to this and they would all be normal. Mostly, you will probably feel concern or worry for your sister. Then you might start to think about how the change will affect you and of course this depends on the type of relationship you have with your sister and her partner. Surprise, worry, sadness, and curiosity would all be normal, but again, if you thought this was a bad partnership, then perhaps you are feeling relieved and happy. In reality, this is a loss for your family and you will likely go through a "grief" period where there is a lot of emotions and it is on your mind a lot. And the intensity of feelings will begin to subside with time.

I am here if you to want to chat more!


Customer: replied 14 days ago.
I am extremely close to this sibling and completely trusted her and her husband. I am feeling traumatized but don't understand why
Expert:  LeahMSWuofm replied 14 days ago.

Ahhh, I see. So you are really feeling blindsided. This may lead to some shock where you struggle to process what is happening but I can imagine there is a range of emotions going crazy. re you feeling angry that this is the first you have known about this? And very worried about your sister? I can't really tell you what is "normal" beyond the shock element but I am here to talk it through with you if you want. :)

Customer: replied 14 days ago.
I'm feeling overwhelmed but cant pin point exactly why. feel like don't want to get married
Expert:  LeahMSWuofm replied 14 days ago.

So it kind of shook your faith in relationships. I can see why. It seems like a big risk. But most marriages succeed, So try not to worry too much about your own future and chances for happiness. Or your sister's. Divorce can actually be freeing and offer new and better opportunities when things weren't so great.

Customer: replied 14 days ago.
the reason for the divorce is sexual addictions which you cant know before. She has several children so it is sad that she is now a single mom. I'm confused and sad.
Expert:  LeahMSWuofm replied 14 days ago.

That is very sad. Especially that children are involved. Do they live close to you?

Customer: replied 14 days ago.
i found out two weeks ago and since then spending a lot of time by her. I'm just way too overwhelmed with feelings but cannot identify it exactly.
Expert:  LeahMSWuofm replied 14 days ago.

She is lucky to have you. The best way for you to heal is to continue to be a good support for her. You will get through this as a family.

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